What True Connection Is Not – and Is – and Why You Need to Know the Difference
LisaMarie • March 18, 2019
Last year, I made the decision to begin creating a 2nd edition of Connection: The New Currency.
Released in 2012, there were elements of this book I wanted to shine light on – and I wanted to create a fresh new approach on the topic.
I hired new editors, a book formatter, and worked with the authors to remove what no longer felt relevant and update their own thinking on connection.
Recently, I did a radio interview about the book, which was just released on March 14th, where I shared the reason this book has been heavy on my heart is we live in the most connected time the world has ever seen and yet it doesn’t always feel that way.
It’s possible to talk with people on the other side of the planet and see them on a video screen as if they were sitting next to you.
(Never in a million years did I ever think I would have clients from other parts of the world – with a 12-hour time difference.)
With a few keystrokes, you can send a text or email to a friend on the other side of the globe, and get a message back in a matter of moments.
You can have partnerships and collaborators in business on multiple continents.
As a kid, if I wanted answers, I went to the Encyclopedia Britannica and looked up the answer.
I could take an adventure all by myself and spend hours immersed in those books.
Today, you have everything you could possibly need to know available in an instant – and 24 hours a day.
My husband notes the “google effect” – and his response to almost every question I ask is, “Just Google it.”
From working with thousands of people I am intimately aware that in spite of how easy it is to communicate with people all over the world in an instant, there are many people who feel disconnected and alone.
Many suffer silently in their own lives not wanting to rock the boat.
Countless others who look like they have it all with the trappings of financial and business success on the outside are lonely in their own homes.
Social media has created a false sense of connection because now you and I are “connected” online yet live in different communities and seldom actually talk or get to spend time together.
Most people lack the intimacy that comes from deep friendships and relationships.
The consequences showing up in research findings are: 1) clinical depression has increased, and 2) loneliness has been linked to disease.
Human beings are communal creatures and need connection to prosper and flourish.
This is why I emphasize connection to the group community at Design Your Destiny Live.
And, in my “Realize Your Destiny”, “Seize Your Spotlight”, and “Live Your Legacy” programs, I highly encourage participants to meet outside of the group interactions and form deeper bonds with each community member.
While some of my colleagues feel this is bad business, I am committed to what is best for my clients – and fully cognizant that connection has the ability to change your life.
When you deepen relationships with people who see you and hear you, your opportunities increase and so does your energy and outlook on life.
Connection becomes a form of currency as you experience the richness in your life from having people in your circle who are there for you in the hard times, and cheer you on in the best of times.
In addition, connection expands your network of resources.
For example, if you recognize your colleague has a skill set that is not in your own wheelhouse, it may make good sense to delegate or outsource that work to your colleague.
In my business, client coach Suzanne Dudley-Schon is better at grammar and punctuation so she edits most of my written work.
Ultimately, this allows me to work smarter, not harder.
What will your connections allow you to accomplish this week?
Action:
The Upside Challenge of the week is calendar 15-minutes of time to connect with others every day this week. Make this a top priority in your life. Notice the impact in the various areas of energy, opportunities, and well-being.
Do what you do best. Network the rest.
The world needs you and your brilliance.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
April 27, 2026
In September 1985 I started my junior year in high school. While I didn't hang out with the most popular bunch, I wasn't considered an outcast either. Perhaps that's one of the places where I learned how to build bridges. Because of it, when I ran for Student Council, much to my own disbelief, I was elected to something. This led to my first official initiation into formal leadership training. While I had taken on roles in school running organizations or organizing projects, this felt like I was officially sanctioned as a leader. I was "doing" leadership. Only leadership isn't something you do, it's something you have to be. You either are a leader or you're not. Lots of folks with titles walk around believing they are a leader or have a lot of knowledge about the topic. Leadership requires wisdom, and wisdom comes from experience. Experience doesn't come from books or even doing. It comes from an inner aptitude when you connect with a purpose that's greater than you. It took me years to understand this ... and many more to be able to share how to get there. That’s the thread that runs through everything I do, including the work we explore in the F Cadre. It’s the work of being the kind of leader who moves life itself. The world will always have opinions about who you should be and what you should chase. And the work that matters asks only that you tune in and follow the pull of what truly matters. Leadership shows up in the person who feels it all, and keeps moving forward. That is where everything worth leading and living begins. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to make space for what truly matters—literally. Declutter one small space today (desk, inbox, calendar) and use that as a literal reflection of making room for what truly matters Let that small act remind you: real leadership, real purpose, and real growth always start in the space you choose to make.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
April 20, 2026
I've had the tendency to idolize my mentors. I would look past their imperfections, wanting only to see goodness in them. Don't make the same mistake I did. Mentors are just imperfect beings on the same journey you're on, and they've gleaned some wisdom from their missteps that can help you advance faster on your journey. That's the benefit of private coaching. And why I offer so little of it. I used to think I wanted to help everyone ... and that everyone had a problem that I could help them solve. That was a bit unrealistic—and dare I say, arrogant. Today I've got clarity around who I will work with—and who I won't. And it has less to do with their personal aptitude and more about their personal attitude towards God and a willingness to understand Divine Right Timing. You can't outgive God. I'm a living proof of that. What I have today did not come from striving harder or positioning myself in the spotlight. It came from obedience layered over time. ~ From saying yes when it was inconvenient. ~ From giving when the numbers did not justify it. ~ From trusting God with my pace, my work, and my future. I own several hundred acres of land across three states—and grew up in a household where money did not flow freely. My first year working in Federal law enforcement I made less than $25,000 a year. There was no visible pathway from there to here. And every time I’ve tried to outwork Him, outmaneuver Him, or rush what wasn’t ripe, I’ve paid for it in exhaustion and misalignment. Yet, every time I’ve trusted Him, honored timing, and given from obedience rather than fear, the return has exceeded anything I could have engineered. Yes, some things don't make sense, yet when you map out a God plan, you don't try to do all of the heavy lifting yourself. And that takes a different kind of Leader. Someone who doesn't need to be on center stage 24x7. That’s the framework I lead from. That’s the lens I coach through. Because the world needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to give God room to lead. Look at one area of your work or leadership where you’ve been forcing results. Stop trying to control it. Step back and ask God to guide your next move. Take one real action: delegate, pause before deciding, or simply wait on His direction. Watch how alignment show up when you stop doing all the heavy lifting yourself. Lastly, share what you discover with me, your mentor, or someone close to you. Speaking it aloud helps you see your next move clearly and step into it with confidence.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
April 13, 2026
Are you thinking of how your choices today are affecting future generations? As someone who doesn't have kids, this used to rarely be on my radar. Yet your choice to bring to life the work that you're called to do will impact the future of your lineage—and folks you've never met. What story will you create based on the choices you make today? See, you create your legacy with the choices that you make right now. The long-lasting impact of your actions can leave behind creations that are innovative and impactful. Take for example the 13-year-old kid who decided to leave a happy note in every bag at the grocery store, just to create a little more cheer in the world. That's legacy. Or what about the kid who practiced free throws every night after school for 3 hours—and then went on to lead his team to the championship in his senior year in college. That's legacy. I remember a few years ago, I hired someone to organize the SOPs and processes for my company. At the time, it felt like a lot of extra work and I wondered if it was worth it. Years later, that choice made everything flow smoother, less rushed, and allowed me and my team to focus on the work we were truly called to do. That’s legacy. Leadership is, as much about what you do in the here and now as it is about legacy for future generations to come. Every one of these moments, big or small, ripples far beyond what you can see today. Each day, each decision plants seeds for generations we may never meet. Tend them with care, with intention, and with faith, trusting that what you do today becomes the foundation for what is possible tomorrow. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to build for someone you will never meet. Choose one action this week that will not benefit you immediately. It could be documenting a process so someone else can lead more easily. Or speaking encouragement that strengthens someone’s confidence long after the moment passes. Or making a decision that protects the future even when the present would prefer convenience. As you do it, hold this prayer quietly, “May this serve beyond me.” Release the outcome. This is leadership that thinks generationally.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
April 6, 2026
Divine obedience. I can't say for most of my life I understood what it meant. To be in the listening to where God wants me to be requires choosing to have enough time and space to listen. Yet I've always been rewarded by doing things quickly. Time and space seemed unnecessary. Or they were needed for folks who didn't learn or pick something up as fast as I did. When I type that now, I almost cringe. "Be still—and know that I am God." It is in the stillness, the soft whisper, that I often get to meet God. And that was elusive for big chunks of time in my life. I'd be running from one event to the next ... running from one opportunity and experience, and often get there out of breath, only to head out again on what I told myself was the next adventure. Rarely did I ever stop and consider where God wanted to lead me. Rarely did my leadership include Him. Rarely did I end up someplace refreshed and renewed—and at peace. Looking back, I can see the patterns that ran my life, and how far away from divine obedience they were. Yet that's what free will is about. The ability to choose. With intention. When you listen to the world's ways, you'll always end up depleted because you're never doing enough. Divine obedience has you listen, and carve out a path of peace and ease. That doesn't mean everything will go your way. Far from it. It does mean that you get to walk every moment stress-free. Even when it looks like everything around you is crashing down. I've lived through fires, floods, and tornados ... and walked away unscathed. I'm not sure the odds of doing this are even possible, let alone probable. Yet here I am. In the midst of the storm, and there will always be a storm, your leadership will ensure you walk on water or drown. With divine obedience, the former is a guarantee. And I gotta tell you that writing all of this out feels scary. For decades, I've been celebrated for my left-brain business mind ... the part of me that doesn't let emotion or things like faith get in the way of building a business with a sound strategy, processes, and standard operating procedures. I can—and have—helped scale hundreds of businesses to reach the elusive 7-figure mark in business, and I still do that in my work today. Yet, today I don't do it without taking everything to prayer. You may have met me when that wasn't how I operated, and my current business model doesn't work for you. And I get that. I just can no longer pretend that I'm somebody that I'm not. I take a fierce stand for my clients and their success—and for me, that involves taking every problem and challenge they face to God first. Together, we create a solution that is designed for the betterment of mankind —and includes everyone in their life. Again, I don't love talking about this. And, it's my Truth. So, how often do you stop and listen to where God is trying to lead you? ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to create space before you create movement. Choose one moment each day where you would normally push ahead. And instead of doing, stop. Sit in stillness for three minutes and invite God into the moment. Ask, “What is mine to do right now?” Wait. Take only the next faithful step you sense. This is divine obedience practiced daily. Calm leadership that walks on water.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
April 27, 2026
In September 1985 I started my junior year in high school. While I didn't hang out with the most popular bunch, I wasn't considered an outcast either. Perhaps that's one of the places where I learned how to build bridges. Because of it, when I ran for Student Council, much to my own disbelief, I was elected to something. This led to my first official initiation into formal leadership training. While I had taken on roles in school running organizations or organizing projects, this felt like I was officially sanctioned as a leader. I was "doing" leadership. Only leadership isn't something you do, it's something you have to be. You either are a leader or you're not. Lots of folks with titles walk around believing they are a leader or have a lot of knowledge about the topic. Leadership requires wisdom, and wisdom comes from experience. Experience doesn't come from books or even doing. It comes from an inner aptitude when you connect with a purpose that's greater than you. It took me years to understand this ... and many more to be able to share how to get there. That’s the thread that runs through everything I do, including the work we explore in the F Cadre. It’s the work of being the kind of leader who moves life itself. The world will always have opinions about who you should be and what you should chase. And the work that matters asks only that you tune in and follow the pull of what truly matters. Leadership shows up in the person who feels it all, and keeps moving forward. That is where everything worth leading and living begins. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to make space for what truly matters—literally. Declutter one small space today (desk, inbox, calendar) and use that as a literal reflection of making room for what truly matters Let that small act remind you: real leadership, real purpose, and real growth always start in the space you choose to make.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
April 20, 2026
I've had the tendency to idolize my mentors. I would look past their imperfections, wanting only to see goodness in them. Don't make the same mistake I did. Mentors are just imperfect beings on the same journey you're on, and they've gleaned some wisdom from their missteps that can help you advance faster on your journey. That's the benefit of private coaching. And why I offer so little of it. I used to think I wanted to help everyone ... and that everyone had a problem that I could help them solve. That was a bit unrealistic—and dare I say, arrogant. Today I've got clarity around who I will work with—and who I won't. And it has less to do with their personal aptitude and more about their personal attitude towards God and a willingness to understand Divine Right Timing. You can't outgive God. I'm a living proof of that. What I have today did not come from striving harder or positioning myself in the spotlight. It came from obedience layered over time. ~ From saying yes when it was inconvenient. ~ From giving when the numbers did not justify it. ~ From trusting God with my pace, my work, and my future. I own several hundred acres of land across three states—and grew up in a household where money did not flow freely. My first year working in Federal law enforcement I made less than $25,000 a year. There was no visible pathway from there to here. And every time I’ve tried to outwork Him, outmaneuver Him, or rush what wasn’t ripe, I’ve paid for it in exhaustion and misalignment. Yet, every time I’ve trusted Him, honored timing, and given from obedience rather than fear, the return has exceeded anything I could have engineered. Yes, some things don't make sense, yet when you map out a God plan, you don't try to do all of the heavy lifting yourself. And that takes a different kind of Leader. Someone who doesn't need to be on center stage 24x7. That’s the framework I lead from. That’s the lens I coach through. Because the world needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to give God room to lead. Look at one area of your work or leadership where you’ve been forcing results. Stop trying to control it. Step back and ask God to guide your next move. Take one real action: delegate, pause before deciding, or simply wait on His direction. Watch how alignment show up when you stop doing all the heavy lifting yourself. Lastly, share what you discover with me, your mentor, or someone close to you. Speaking it aloud helps you see your next move clearly and step into it with confidence.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
April 13, 2026
Are you thinking of how your choices today are affecting future generations? As someone who doesn't have kids, this used to rarely be on my radar. Yet your choice to bring to life the work that you're called to do will impact the future of your lineage—and folks you've never met. What story will you create based on the choices you make today? See, you create your legacy with the choices that you make right now. The long-lasting impact of your actions can leave behind creations that are innovative and impactful. Take for example the 13-year-old kid who decided to leave a happy note in every bag at the grocery store, just to create a little more cheer in the world. That's legacy. Or what about the kid who practiced free throws every night after school for 3 hours—and then went on to lead his team to the championship in his senior year in college. That's legacy. I remember a few years ago, I hired someone to organize the SOPs and processes for my company. At the time, it felt like a lot of extra work and I wondered if it was worth it. Years later, that choice made everything flow smoother, less rushed, and allowed me and my team to focus on the work we were truly called to do. That’s legacy. Leadership is, as much about what you do in the here and now as it is about legacy for future generations to come. Every one of these moments, big or small, ripples far beyond what you can see today. Each day, each decision plants seeds for generations we may never meet. Tend them with care, with intention, and with faith, trusting that what you do today becomes the foundation for what is possible tomorrow. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to build for someone you will never meet. Choose one action this week that will not benefit you immediately. It could be documenting a process so someone else can lead more easily. Or speaking encouragement that strengthens someone’s confidence long after the moment passes. Or making a decision that protects the future even when the present would prefer convenience. As you do it, hold this prayer quietly, “May this serve beyond me.” Release the outcome. This is leadership that thinks generationally.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
April 6, 2026
Divine obedience. I can't say for most of my life I understood what it meant. To be in the listening to where God wants me to be requires choosing to have enough time and space to listen. Yet I've always been rewarded by doing things quickly. Time and space seemed unnecessary. Or they were needed for folks who didn't learn or pick something up as fast as I did. When I type that now, I almost cringe. "Be still—and know that I am God." It is in the stillness, the soft whisper, that I often get to meet God. And that was elusive for big chunks of time in my life. I'd be running from one event to the next ... running from one opportunity and experience, and often get there out of breath, only to head out again on what I told myself was the next adventure. Rarely did I ever stop and consider where God wanted to lead me. Rarely did my leadership include Him. Rarely did I end up someplace refreshed and renewed—and at peace. Looking back, I can see the patterns that ran my life, and how far away from divine obedience they were. Yet that's what free will is about. The ability to choose. With intention. When you listen to the world's ways, you'll always end up depleted because you're never doing enough. Divine obedience has you listen, and carve out a path of peace and ease. That doesn't mean everything will go your way. Far from it. It does mean that you get to walk every moment stress-free. Even when it looks like everything around you is crashing down. I've lived through fires, floods, and tornados ... and walked away unscathed. I'm not sure the odds of doing this are even possible, let alone probable. Yet here I am. In the midst of the storm, and there will always be a storm, your leadership will ensure you walk on water or drown. With divine obedience, the former is a guarantee. And I gotta tell you that writing all of this out feels scary. For decades, I've been celebrated for my left-brain business mind ... the part of me that doesn't let emotion or things like faith get in the way of building a business with a sound strategy, processes, and standard operating procedures. I can—and have—helped scale hundreds of businesses to reach the elusive 7-figure mark in business, and I still do that in my work today. Yet, today I don't do it without taking everything to prayer. You may have met me when that wasn't how I operated, and my current business model doesn't work for you. And I get that. I just can no longer pretend that I'm somebody that I'm not. I take a fierce stand for my clients and their success—and for me, that involves taking every problem and challenge they face to God first. Together, we create a solution that is designed for the betterment of mankind —and includes everyone in their life. Again, I don't love talking about this. And, it's my Truth. So, how often do you stop and listen to where God is trying to lead you? ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to create space before you create movement. Choose one moment each day where you would normally push ahead. And instead of doing, stop. Sit in stillness for three minutes and invite God into the moment. Ask, “What is mine to do right now?” Wait. Take only the next faithful step you sense. This is divine obedience practiced daily. Calm leadership that walks on water.
