The Courage to Forgive in Difficult Times
Lisa Marie Platske • March 4, 2024
Delicate times.
That’s the best way I can describe the world today.
My choice to remain upside with all that swirls around me and in me doesn’t mean I’m oblivious to the pain going on in the world.
Most days I’m engaged in difficult, and often emotionally-charged conversations, and at times with people whose views differ from mine.
Most days I experience bouts of uncertainty, questioning what I’m being asked – dare I say, called by the Holy Spirit -- to do with my life.
Many days the conversations are with folks, ranging in age from 21-71, who are dealing with addictions, trauma, and grief.
Usually, there is also anger associated with each of these situations. That doesn't mean they're raving lunatics.
You probably couldn't tell as the anger, guilt, and shame are internal.
I'm honored to do this leadership work because I understand it.
Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, “For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness.”
After 9/11, I was angry. Very, very angry.
This anger was the culmination of years of anger, and until I learned where my anger came from and I shifted the way I saw the world, I rarely felt really happy.
I see a lot of that going on right now.
In 2001, I made the decision I didn’t want anger to be my operating system where I traded in my happiness for the pain that was behind the anger.
There are things that are going on in the world right now that anger me greatly, and I focus my energy on taking positive action.
And, I make room to grieve.
Happiness is a state of being.
While you may experience joy here and there, if your neuro-network allows anger to run the show, you stop yourself from choosing happiness and being happy.
By holding on to anger for too long in any given situation, you harm yourself.
There are certain techniques I use to release anger and grief.
For starters, to release anger, I identify what it is I am angry about and why.
I examine the content and the context. Then I decide to take the energy created by the emotion and consciously direct it into a constructive action.
By taking positive action, I de-energize the situation, detach from the content to focus my action, and am freed up to move forward without baggage.
I also do a forgiveness exercise. While simple, it's not a 'once and done' activity.
You deserve to be happy.
The best leaders get this.
Not from a place of ignorance, rather from a place of choice.
ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to practice consciously releasing anger and choosing happiness instead.
When you notice yourself feeling angry about a situation, pause and reflect:
- What specifically is triggering this anger? Name it.
- What past experiences or patterns may this be bringing up for you?
- How might this situation look from the other person's perspective?
- What constructive action could you take to improve things?
Then, make a deliberate choice to release the anger and redirect that energy into positive change, rather than fueling negativity.
Let go of what you cannot control.
Forgive others and yourself.
Finally, do something that brings you joy - listen to uplifting music, get outdoors, call a friend, play with a pet.
Your leadership is defined not by an easy life. It is by how you meet adversity, wisdom, compassion and courage.
The world needs beacons of hope that remind us happiness is a choice, in any moment.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
March 10, 2026
What may look like ordinary sameness to other people is often an exhilarating journey to me… …when I choose to see it that way. I celebrate: My wins. My losses. My everyday actions. Moment by moment, I’m grateful for the journey. Because that’s what success looks like. Despite what the world wants you to believe, success isn't perfection or acts of grandeur. Success doesn't always come with a parade or accolades that get you on the cover of the magazine. Success is the manifestation of your design. You get to decide every day if you're the kind of leader that would be worth following—in your family, your workplace, and your circle of friends. The key is to be honest about your thoughts, actions, and behaviors and what they are producing. In many ways, you're told to turn a blind eye to shortcomings and bury them or numb them. For example, excessive drinking can be excused when someone is under stress as it's deemed socially acceptable. And what would be considered excessive in one area seems to be celebrated in another arena. These moral conflicts impede the path to real success ... the kind where you look in the mirror and you're proud of every decision you've made. Leadership can be complicated as leaders are often sought out for answers and their acumen in a particular area. Yet that doesn't mean they're any more perfect than you are. And when you haven't defined success for yourself, you will always come up short. Success begins the moment you stop letting the world tell you who you should be. Leadership starts within. It shows up in the choices you make when no one is applauding. You were designed with intention. When your decisions honor that design, clarity replaces confusion and integrity becomes your compass. This is what real leadership looks like... quiet strength, and a life that reflects who you were created to be. That choice is available to you every single day. And today is a powerful place to begin. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to notice one ordinary action you take that reflects who you want to be as a leader. It could be how you respond to someone, how you follow through on a small task, or how you speak to yourself. Acknowledge it. Honor it. Let it be proof that your design is showing up in real time. Remember, success is in these conscious, everyday choices.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
March 2, 2026
Sometimes you have an idea of how you believe something should be. Your idea, however, is much grander than reality. Because you don't want to give up on the grandness of that vision, you start to twist yourself into a pretzel—and do things that aren't really you to see if you can make what you want come to life. People do this with relationships, their career or business path, and their God-given mission. Looking at something and accepting it for what it is takes massive amounts of courage. In a world that will give you a free pass if you make excuses for your behavior rather than encouraging you to look in the mirror, I see this path more times than I'd ever thought I would. Someone recently asked me why most folks find accountability inherently difficult. He was looking for someone to hold him accountable, and realized that no one in his friend circle had the strength or capacity to do it. After a long pause, I shared with him that if someone were to hold you accountable for your behavior, they'd have to look at and acknowledge their own shortcoming and missteps. It's just easier to ignore what you're doing, so they don't have to look at what they're doing. Long ago, I made a pact with myself that I wanted people in my life who were committed to honest, transparent dialogue. Over the past several decades, this has served me well—even when it hasn't been comfortable. I'm not looking for a free pass. Leadership is challenging, sometimes messy, and always uncomfortable. Most folks just aren't interested in signing up for something that doesn't have them feel good 24x7. When I got clear on the 7 Pillars of God-Centered Leadership, it was like something shifted in me. I got that when I walked this path and took this journey, I didn't need to twist myself into a pretzel or spend time worrying about what other people thought about me. As long as my heart is right with God, leadership is about His way, not mine. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to write down the qualities that would earn someone the right to speak into your life. Focus on who they are and not what they do. Choose qualities anchored in truth, integrity, humility, and alignment with your Divine mission. Then pause and look at your list honestly. Let your life rise to meet what you say you value.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 23, 2026
You can believe the best or worst about people. It’s less lonely to believe the best in them, yet that's really hard to do, especially when you've been burned over and over. When I think about leadership as a whole, this is one of the hardest elements to master because people are human. ~ They're going to get stuff wrong. ~ They're going to say things you don't like. ~ They're going to hurt your feelings, even if you don't want to admit it. At some point, most folks give up trying or at least caring. It's often easier to numb or ignore than to deal with a disappointment. Yet numbing or ignoring doesn't change the body's reaction internally to the situation. To get to a place where you are able to believe the best in folks takes work. There is no leadership pill or shortcut. At least not one that I've ever found. One of the biggest flexes is being able to hold space for someone when they've wronged you. I remember years ago reading an article about Richard Branson, and one of his employees who had stolen from him. Branson told the manager to speak to him—and give him a second chance. A second chance?!? Are you kidding me?!? That's a break in integrity and grounds for removal in any industry. Reading this had me wonder what Branson knew about leadership that at the time I didn't. To take it a step further, my curiosity increased and I wondered what would happen if I did something like this in my own life. It felt awkward to try this idea on as I had long-rooted beliefs that certain behaviors were vehemently wrong—and should be punished. Was it possible that leadership required unconditional love? Now, this didn't mean being a doormat and letting someone walk all over you. Anyone who knows me understands that's never gonna happen. Yet this new perspective, this new lens, had me curious about what would happen if I led from that place. Over the years, I can say it hasn't been the easiest thing to do—and it's been the most rewarding. I still have folks come back to me who wronged me telling me how much they respect the way I handled the situation. My greatest desire for folks is that they lead their lives in a way that honors the core of their being—their divine mission and purpose. And it's really hard to do that when you're steeped in judgment, blame, or shame-inducing behaviors. Love is the answer, regardless of the question. Because you can choose to believe the worst in people. Or you can choose to see the best in people. It's always your choice. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to choose one person who has disappointed or frustrated you. Take one step from your highest self that keeps your heart open. Speak with calm. Acknowledge something they did right. And release the story you’ve been holding. Lead from love today.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 16, 2026
Life’s little synchronicities. Have you noticed them? Something happens that was too meaningful to be a coincidence. ~ Meeting that person. ~ Getting that call. ~ Having the impossible become possible?!? Perhaps you’re thinking about someone, and then they call. How does that happen?!? Or, you get a bill, and you've got no idea how you’re going to pay it. And then, poof! ... the exact amount of money you need just shows up. I’ve experienced countless events like these throughout my life. And while some people believe they are random, I understand in the depth of my being that these experiences are signs from the Holy Spirit to get my attention or answer a prayer. When you are in co-creation with all of Life, you get messages to confirm you’re on the right path. When I’m in ease and grace, greater wealth, opportunities, and relationships flow into my life. It’s magical. However, you have to be open to notice the signs in the first place. Every synchronicity carries wisdom for the journey. When you lean into the whispers of the Holy Spirit, life opens in ways you couldn’t script on your own. Stay open. Stay expectant. What you’ve been seeking may already be moving towards you in ways you can’t yet see. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stay on the lookout for meaningful synchronicities throughout your days. Each time one happens, jot it down so you don’t forget. At the end of the week sit with your list and speak your gratitude aloud for every moment that aligned for you.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
March 10, 2026
What may look like ordinary sameness to other people is often an exhilarating journey to me… …when I choose to see it that way. I celebrate: My wins. My losses. My everyday actions. Moment by moment, I’m grateful for the journey. Because that’s what success looks like. Despite what the world wants you to believe, success isn't perfection or acts of grandeur. Success doesn't always come with a parade or accolades that get you on the cover of the magazine. Success is the manifestation of your design. You get to decide every day if you're the kind of leader that would be worth following—in your family, your workplace, and your circle of friends. The key is to be honest about your thoughts, actions, and behaviors and what they are producing. In many ways, you're told to turn a blind eye to shortcomings and bury them or numb them. For example, excessive drinking can be excused when someone is under stress as it's deemed socially acceptable. And what would be considered excessive in one area seems to be celebrated in another arena. These moral conflicts impede the path to real success ... the kind where you look in the mirror and you're proud of every decision you've made. Leadership can be complicated as leaders are often sought out for answers and their acumen in a particular area. Yet that doesn't mean they're any more perfect than you are. And when you haven't defined success for yourself, you will always come up short. Success begins the moment you stop letting the world tell you who you should be. Leadership starts within. It shows up in the choices you make when no one is applauding. You were designed with intention. When your decisions honor that design, clarity replaces confusion and integrity becomes your compass. This is what real leadership looks like... quiet strength, and a life that reflects who you were created to be. That choice is available to you every single day. And today is a powerful place to begin. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to notice one ordinary action you take that reflects who you want to be as a leader. It could be how you respond to someone, how you follow through on a small task, or how you speak to yourself. Acknowledge it. Honor it. Let it be proof that your design is showing up in real time. Remember, success is in these conscious, everyday choices.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
March 2, 2026
Sometimes you have an idea of how you believe something should be. Your idea, however, is much grander than reality. Because you don't want to give up on the grandness of that vision, you start to twist yourself into a pretzel—and do things that aren't really you to see if you can make what you want come to life. People do this with relationships, their career or business path, and their God-given mission. Looking at something and accepting it for what it is takes massive amounts of courage. In a world that will give you a free pass if you make excuses for your behavior rather than encouraging you to look in the mirror, I see this path more times than I'd ever thought I would. Someone recently asked me why most folks find accountability inherently difficult. He was looking for someone to hold him accountable, and realized that no one in his friend circle had the strength or capacity to do it. After a long pause, I shared with him that if someone were to hold you accountable for your behavior, they'd have to look at and acknowledge their own shortcoming and missteps. It's just easier to ignore what you're doing, so they don't have to look at what they're doing. Long ago, I made a pact with myself that I wanted people in my life who were committed to honest, transparent dialogue. Over the past several decades, this has served me well—even when it hasn't been comfortable. I'm not looking for a free pass. Leadership is challenging, sometimes messy, and always uncomfortable. Most folks just aren't interested in signing up for something that doesn't have them feel good 24x7. When I got clear on the 7 Pillars of God-Centered Leadership, it was like something shifted in me. I got that when I walked this path and took this journey, I didn't need to twist myself into a pretzel or spend time worrying about what other people thought about me. As long as my heart is right with God, leadership is about His way, not mine. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to write down the qualities that would earn someone the right to speak into your life. Focus on who they are and not what they do. Choose qualities anchored in truth, integrity, humility, and alignment with your Divine mission. Then pause and look at your list honestly. Let your life rise to meet what you say you value.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 23, 2026
You can believe the best or worst about people. It’s less lonely to believe the best in them, yet that's really hard to do, especially when you've been burned over and over. When I think about leadership as a whole, this is one of the hardest elements to master because people are human. ~ They're going to get stuff wrong. ~ They're going to say things you don't like. ~ They're going to hurt your feelings, even if you don't want to admit it. At some point, most folks give up trying or at least caring. It's often easier to numb or ignore than to deal with a disappointment. Yet numbing or ignoring doesn't change the body's reaction internally to the situation. To get to a place where you are able to believe the best in folks takes work. There is no leadership pill or shortcut. At least not one that I've ever found. One of the biggest flexes is being able to hold space for someone when they've wronged you. I remember years ago reading an article about Richard Branson, and one of his employees who had stolen from him. Branson told the manager to speak to him—and give him a second chance. A second chance?!? Are you kidding me?!? That's a break in integrity and grounds for removal in any industry. Reading this had me wonder what Branson knew about leadership that at the time I didn't. To take it a step further, my curiosity increased and I wondered what would happen if I did something like this in my own life. It felt awkward to try this idea on as I had long-rooted beliefs that certain behaviors were vehemently wrong—and should be punished. Was it possible that leadership required unconditional love? Now, this didn't mean being a doormat and letting someone walk all over you. Anyone who knows me understands that's never gonna happen. Yet this new perspective, this new lens, had me curious about what would happen if I led from that place. Over the years, I can say it hasn't been the easiest thing to do—and it's been the most rewarding. I still have folks come back to me who wronged me telling me how much they respect the way I handled the situation. My greatest desire for folks is that they lead their lives in a way that honors the core of their being—their divine mission and purpose. And it's really hard to do that when you're steeped in judgment, blame, or shame-inducing behaviors. Love is the answer, regardless of the question. Because you can choose to believe the worst in people. Or you can choose to see the best in people. It's always your choice. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to choose one person who has disappointed or frustrated you. Take one step from your highest self that keeps your heart open. Speak with calm. Acknowledge something they did right. And release the story you’ve been holding. Lead from love today.
By Lisa Marie Platske
•
February 16, 2026
Life’s little synchronicities. Have you noticed them? Something happens that was too meaningful to be a coincidence. ~ Meeting that person. ~ Getting that call. ~ Having the impossible become possible?!? Perhaps you’re thinking about someone, and then they call. How does that happen?!? Or, you get a bill, and you've got no idea how you’re going to pay it. And then, poof! ... the exact amount of money you need just shows up. I’ve experienced countless events like these throughout my life. And while some people believe they are random, I understand in the depth of my being that these experiences are signs from the Holy Spirit to get my attention or answer a prayer. When you are in co-creation with all of Life, you get messages to confirm you’re on the right path. When I’m in ease and grace, greater wealth, opportunities, and relationships flow into my life. It’s magical. However, you have to be open to notice the signs in the first place. Every synchronicity carries wisdom for the journey. When you lean into the whispers of the Holy Spirit, life opens in ways you couldn’t script on your own. Stay open. Stay expectant. What you’ve been seeking may already be moving towards you in ways you can’t yet see. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stay on the lookout for meaningful synchronicities throughout your days. Each time one happens, jot it down so you don’t forget. At the end of the week sit with your list and speak your gratitude aloud for every moment that aligned for you.
