Choosing Forgiveness…It’s Not About Them

Lisa Marie Platske • February 19, 2018

 

This week I invite you to choose forgiveness. Whatever you are dealing with right now. Step into your greatness, by choosing forgiveness. Because your destiny is about you and you alone.


I received 27 emails, phone calls or hand-written cards expressing love and gratitude for what I gave on stage at Design Your Destiny Live.


And, still it showed up.


Again.


Harsh criticism.


(Or, at least that’s the way it feels.)


Sometimes it shows up after I post a particularly provocative Upside Thought.


Other times it happens after I post something on social media and give voice to something that makes someone uncomfortable.


This time it came from someone who felt she had the right to give me “feedback” after I poured my heart and soul on stage at my live event.


It showed up in the form of a 2 and ½ page typed letter that was mailed to my home, describing in detail all of the things I did or didn’t do (mostly didn’t do) right at my event from her perspective.


Voicing what was “wrong” about the event, she outlined countless elements from who I chose as panelists, to the way the modules were scheduled, to who I called on, to how I interact with the audience, my comments about law enforcement and much more.


She shared her credentials in the latter part of the communication so that I understood she had the right to judge me.


Using words like she was hoping I was open to “constructive feedback” is usually what someone says to make themselves feel better when they make the decision to be right over being kind.


So, why would I decide to write about this in my Upside Thought?


Because when you make the decision to step out into your calling, there are no guarantees that it will be easy or you won’t be trampled upon – even when you do your best.


There will always be individuals who believe that they have the right to criticize your work.

Choosing Forgiveness - Upside Thinking


Yes, in a world where you may be called to make a difference, there will always be people who challenge you.


Yet, comfort doesn’t change the world.


Her words will not silence me, nor will I allow her to be the judge and jury of my work.


This is work I have been called to do; it is my mission and purpose.


As someone who is committed to mercy, justice, and protection, it is not lost on me that part of the curriculum at Design Your Destiny Live is forgiveness of self and others so this was a great place for me to practice what I preach and be gentle on myself – with a little help from my friends.


Because I serve on the board of Project Forgive, a global organization that provides education on the healing effects of forgiveness, I take my responsibility seriously and am accountable for my actions at all times.


On day #1 at my live event, I share an acronym and poem that seems appropriate to end this week’s Upside Thought.


To “adore” means to “love and respect deeply”.


When you adore your life, magic happens and designing your destiny is easier. (Note: I said “easier”, not easy)


A – Accept what needs to change.


D – Decide to trust that everything is conspiring for my greatest good.


O – Order my steps toward forgiveness in all areas of my life.


R– Renew what is most beautiful inside of me.


E – Expand my love and compassion towards others.


“People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.

Love them anyway. 


If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.

Do good anyway.


If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies. 

Succeed anyway.


The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. 

Do good anyway. 


Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. 

Be honest and frank anyway. 


The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds. 

Think big anyway. 


People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs. 

Fight for a few underdogs anyway. 


What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. 

Build anyway. 


People really need help but may attach you if you do help them. 

Help people anyway. 


Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. 

Give the world the best you have anyway.“


– The Paradoxical Commandments by Dr. Kent M. Keith


Choosing Forgiveness

Whatever you are dealing with right now — a difficult boss, a nasty neighbor, a rebellious child, an aging parent – please realize that this circumstance has nothing to do with how wonderful you are or your capacity to make a big difference in the world.


Choose to love and forgive them anyway……


…because it was never about them anyway.


The world needs you and your brilliance.


Remember, the people you are called to serve are waiting for you – and only they can hear your message.


So, don’t worry about the people who don’t get it.


Your message wasn’t meant for them anyway.


Action Item: Choosing Forgiveness - Upside Thinking

The Upside Challenge of the week is to think about someone who has hurt you and choose to forgive their actions – because this is what leaders worth following do.


Comfort doesn’t change the world.


Vulnerability changes everything.


Remember, the world needs you and your brilliance.


See Upside. Be Upside. Lead Upside.

Don’t Wait for Permission to Do What Works

By Lisa Marie Platske • February 9, 2026
“You can’t quit your job to open a business. You don’t even know anything about business.” I get it. Taking a leap of faith doesn’t make sense. That’s why it’s called faith. So I took the leap of faith anyway. “That’s not the way we do that here.” I understand. And I created a new way of doing business that is more effective—and fun! “Why must you be such a troublemaker?” I don’t know what you mean. I get there are rules within the system—and I chose to create a new system. “That’s not possible.” Sure it is. I just did it. “You’re being reckless. You have responsibilities.” It depends on how you look at it. I see unlimited possibilities. These are real-life conversations I've had with folks in different seasons of my life. See, the rewards of courageous leadership are immense. Questioning 'what if...' to create 'what is' has been my journey. And it’s probably yours, too. You can’t live out your mission by playing by the rules of a broken world. Don’t let the “we’ve always done it this way” paradigm get in the way of making a positive difference on the planet. Remember, there’s always a way. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stop letting “we’ve always done it this way” slow your impact. Take a process, workflow, or system that isn’t serving your mission and start redesigning it. Remember, there’s always a way to make a bigger difference and it starts with your decision to do things differently.

When Staying Liked Costs Your Soul

By Lisa Marie Platske • February 2, 2026
You have been hard-wired for greatness so stop trying so hard to be something other than who you are. I see it all the time. Folks who tie themselves into knots, seeking the approval of others. Oh, it's not conscious. Most leaders would tell you that they're comfortable being their own boss, in charge of their time. Behind closed doors, many of them have told me something different. And that's because conflict, being misunderstood, and being vilified are pretty crummy. Most folks want to be liked. They want to be valued and appreciated for the effort they've put in. Your greatest gift to the planet is to be fully, completely, and unapologetically who you are. Doing that may come with some pretty harsh consequences ... which is why most leaders are willing to sell out. The thing that isn't always self-evident about compromising your values and beliefs is that every night you're stuck with you. You have to look at yourself in the mirror. You are the only one who understands the choices you've made—right, wrong, or indifferent. When the day is done, the truth always meets you in the quiet. It asks whether you stood in integrity or traded pieces of yourself to keep the peace. Leadership requires decisions that don’t win applause. It often asks you to hold your ground when others want you to bend. Living aligned with who you are may cost you approval or relationships. Yet, it will never cost you your soul. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to name a decision you’ve been avoiding because it feels risky or uncomfortable. It could be ending a partnership that no longer serves your vision, raising the standards for a client, or closing a door that keeps you from your calling. Take one bold, aligned action this week that honors your integrity and the leader you were created to be.

The Joy of Living Your Divine Mission

By Lisa Marie Platske • January 26, 2026
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." ~ Helen Keller Purpose. The dictionary definition is, " the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists. " You were put on the planet for a reason ... a purpose. And, part of the joy of the journey is to be in the discovery and fulfillment of that divine purpose . Perhaps that's why Helen Keller said what she said. Too often, folks get sidetracked by fame and fortune, or comfort and easy. While they each have their allure, they will never bring you happiness. True happiness comes from meaning. Over the decades, there have been countless subjects and research projects on the topic of happiness. The results of all of them have pointed back to this truth. When I think about the leaders that I've had the privilege of working with, the ones that were the happiest weren't the ones that had situations that were easy. Actually, life came down pretty hard on some of them and they were in peril. While they came to me seeking answers about how to right the ship, the journey rarely involved signing a multi-million dollar deal that got them to happiness island. It was the ability to peel away each layer of their circumstances and see it through the lens of their divine mission and purpose. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to notice where your influence thrive. At times, we can lose sight of what truly matters. So today, observe the work, conversations, and moments where you naturally make a difference. Do more of those things, even in small ways. Your purpose is revealed in the places where your leadership produces impact and meaning.

Where Focus Goes, Expansion Flows

By Lisa Marie Platske • January 19, 2026
Choice. Direction. Commitment. Consistent Action. Rinse and repeat. If you do this, a lot can change in a year. There was a season where most folks in my industry started cutting back—and I did the opposite. I doubled down on the number of hours I was investing in my business. I created new programming for my live events, and I hired 4 new people. At the time, I also chose to invest in myself and upped my personal commitment to excellence in every area of my life, getting up early and doing the work physically, mentally, intellectually, spiritually, financially, relationally, and creatively. My business expanded, my relationships grew stronger, and at the time, I released 18 pounds. See, most people are more committed to fixing what isn’t working that they can’t see what is working. They stop being grateful for what's right in front of them . They stop being able to see the miracles that are happening in front of their eyes. I recently had a private leadership retreat day with a guy who said, "If miracles were happening in my life, I'd certainly see them." He said it with conviction, bravado, and a tiny bit of arrogance. I called him on it and pointed out three things that were miracles in the making that had just happened in his life. When you focus solely on the problem, you always lose. Over the past year, when people were wondering what they were going to do over the weekend, I was thinking about this moment. Right here and right now. Today, I’m mapping out what’s going to happen over the next 12 – 24 months in my business—all while staying rooted in the here and now. Commit to excellence and your life will change. You will turn possibilities into realities. I’m a living proof. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to look at where you’ve been relying on experience instead of intention. Leaders sometimes can easily coast on what’s worked before, forgetting that excellence requires evolution. Identify one area where you’ve been leading on autopilot. It could be a system, relationship, or habit that could be sharper, more aligned, or more alive. Then refine it. Because you’re committed to mastery.
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Don’t Wait for Permission to Do What Works

By Lisa Marie Platske • February 9, 2026
“You can’t quit your job to open a business. You don’t even know anything about business.” I get it. Taking a leap of faith doesn’t make sense. That’s why it’s called faith. So I took the leap of faith anyway. “That’s not the way we do that here.” I understand. And I created a new way of doing business that is more effective—and fun! “Why must you be such a troublemaker?” I don’t know what you mean. I get there are rules within the system—and I chose to create a new system. “That’s not possible.” Sure it is. I just did it. “You’re being reckless. You have responsibilities.” It depends on how you look at it. I see unlimited possibilities. These are real-life conversations I've had with folks in different seasons of my life. See, the rewards of courageous leadership are immense. Questioning 'what if...' to create 'what is' has been my journey. And it’s probably yours, too. You can’t live out your mission by playing by the rules of a broken world. Don’t let the “we’ve always done it this way” paradigm get in the way of making a positive difference on the planet. Remember, there’s always a way. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stop letting “we’ve always done it this way” slow your impact. Take a process, workflow, or system that isn’t serving your mission and start redesigning it. Remember, there’s always a way to make a bigger difference and it starts with your decision to do things differently.

When Staying Liked Costs Your Soul

By Lisa Marie Platske • February 2, 2026
You have been hard-wired for greatness so stop trying so hard to be something other than who you are. I see it all the time. Folks who tie themselves into knots, seeking the approval of others. Oh, it's not conscious. Most leaders would tell you that they're comfortable being their own boss, in charge of their time. Behind closed doors, many of them have told me something different. And that's because conflict, being misunderstood, and being vilified are pretty crummy. Most folks want to be liked. They want to be valued and appreciated for the effort they've put in. Your greatest gift to the planet is to be fully, completely, and unapologetically who you are. Doing that may come with some pretty harsh consequences ... which is why most leaders are willing to sell out. The thing that isn't always self-evident about compromising your values and beliefs is that every night you're stuck with you. You have to look at yourself in the mirror. You are the only one who understands the choices you've made—right, wrong, or indifferent. When the day is done, the truth always meets you in the quiet. It asks whether you stood in integrity or traded pieces of yourself to keep the peace. Leadership requires decisions that don’t win applause. It often asks you to hold your ground when others want you to bend. Living aligned with who you are may cost you approval or relationships. Yet, it will never cost you your soul. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to name a decision you’ve been avoiding because it feels risky or uncomfortable. It could be ending a partnership that no longer serves your vision, raising the standards for a client, or closing a door that keeps you from your calling. Take one bold, aligned action this week that honors your integrity and the leader you were created to be.

The Joy of Living Your Divine Mission

By Lisa Marie Platske • January 26, 2026
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." ~ Helen Keller Purpose. The dictionary definition is, " the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists. " You were put on the planet for a reason ... a purpose. And, part of the joy of the journey is to be in the discovery and fulfillment of that divine purpose . Perhaps that's why Helen Keller said what she said. Too often, folks get sidetracked by fame and fortune, or comfort and easy. While they each have their allure, they will never bring you happiness. True happiness comes from meaning. Over the decades, there have been countless subjects and research projects on the topic of happiness. The results of all of them have pointed back to this truth. When I think about the leaders that I've had the privilege of working with, the ones that were the happiest weren't the ones that had situations that were easy. Actually, life came down pretty hard on some of them and they were in peril. While they came to me seeking answers about how to right the ship, the journey rarely involved signing a multi-million dollar deal that got them to happiness island. It was the ability to peel away each layer of their circumstances and see it through the lens of their divine mission and purpose. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to notice where your influence thrive. At times, we can lose sight of what truly matters. So today, observe the work, conversations, and moments where you naturally make a difference. Do more of those things, even in small ways. Your purpose is revealed in the places where your leadership produces impact and meaning.

Where Focus Goes, Expansion Flows

By Lisa Marie Platske • January 19, 2026
Choice. Direction. Commitment. Consistent Action. Rinse and repeat. If you do this, a lot can change in a year. There was a season where most folks in my industry started cutting back—and I did the opposite. I doubled down on the number of hours I was investing in my business. I created new programming for my live events, and I hired 4 new people. At the time, I also chose to invest in myself and upped my personal commitment to excellence in every area of my life, getting up early and doing the work physically, mentally, intellectually, spiritually, financially, relationally, and creatively. My business expanded, my relationships grew stronger, and at the time, I released 18 pounds. See, most people are more committed to fixing what isn’t working that they can’t see what is working. They stop being grateful for what's right in front of them . They stop being able to see the miracles that are happening in front of their eyes. I recently had a private leadership retreat day with a guy who said, "If miracles were happening in my life, I'd certainly see them." He said it with conviction, bravado, and a tiny bit of arrogance. I called him on it and pointed out three things that were miracles in the making that had just happened in his life. When you focus solely on the problem, you always lose. Over the past year, when people were wondering what they were going to do over the weekend, I was thinking about this moment. Right here and right now. Today, I’m mapping out what’s going to happen over the next 12 – 24 months in my business—all while staying rooted in the here and now. Commit to excellence and your life will change. You will turn possibilities into realities. I’m a living proof. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to look at where you’ve been relying on experience instead of intention. Leaders sometimes can easily coast on what’s worked before, forgetting that excellence requires evolution. Identify one area where you’ve been leading on autopilot. It could be a system, relationship, or habit that could be sharper, more aligned, or more alive. Then refine it. Because you’re committed to mastery.
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