3 Critical Elements to Communicating as a Leader

Lisa Marie Platske • April 8, 2013

 I have a BIG personality.


One that can fill a room.


My grandfather used to say I could change the energy in the room just by being in it.(And, I was only 9 at the time.)


And, I have opinions.


Did I mention that I freely share those opinions?!?


Yes, if I’m not careful I can overpowerthose around me.


And, it’s not just that I have a BIG personality, and share what I think, it’s also that I like to talk. (My husband, not so much.)


My very presence can overwhelm the sweetest soul while my run-on sentences – I mean paragraphs – swirl overhead like a cartoon character which can throw them into overload.


I’m also not afraid to tell it like it is (inherited from my law enforcement days) – which can bring a boatload of trouble, too if I’m not mindful.


So, I’d like to share the three (3) most critical elements that great leaders must know when communicating with others. (This is from my lessons-learned-the-hard-way manual….)


First, great leaders recognize that asking great questions is always more important that giving solutions.


This goes back to overcoming business blunder #1. Most people just don’t think and operate like a journalist – and you need to in order to connect with others. Any “who, what, where, when, and why” scenario will do as long as you’re deliberate. It is also about being more interested in others than striving to be interesting. Be a world-class question-asker.


Second, great leaders listen to the answers given – and listen well.


They make the commitment to actively listen, rather than focusing on what to say next. After all, when you do that, you’re present in the moment and give the other person the gift of your full attention.


The secret is to commit to listen more than you speak every day. I’ve been practicing this as it doesn’t come easy for me.


I’ve also been working on not interrupting others when they speak, waiting until they’re finished, considering what they said, and then responding with care and compassion.


And, third, great leaders choose the words they speak wisely.


When you’ve got flair, it’s important to understand filters.


Filters enable you to engage your brain before you engage your mouth.


In my book Connection: The New Currency, I wrote about the Bank of Authentic Connection. We all have an account there. Some people are overdrawn and others are flush with cash.


The best leaders consider how their words affect others, choosing wisely.


Once the words come out of your mouth, it’s impossible to take them back.


It’s like not knowing your own strength and squeezing too much hair gel out of the tube. Once it’s out, you can’t put it back in and all you’re left with a sticky mess on your hands.


Even if you apologize and ask for forgiveness, those words are out there. Forever.


The Upside Challenge for the week is to examine your own communication style, and what you will choose to do differently. I shared with you what I was working on, and if you remember these three gems, you’ll get it right every time.


See Upside. Be Upside. Lead Upside.

By Lisa Marie Platske December 22, 2025
This message comes three days before Christmas, a season that calls us back to love and light, from a place of deep gratitude and a depth of humility that has me moved to tears. From the Festival of Lights to the upcoming New Year's festivities, celebrations are all around. Parties, gift giving and conversations about being merry and jolly seem to fill the air a bit more during this time of year. Yet, this experience isn't true for everyone. I am mindful that this time of year doesn't bring lightness and joy for all. It is a time of year that can trigger memories of years gone by... ... broken dreams and longing for people you wish you could pick up the phone and hear their voice one more time. If you have lost a loved one this year, or simply feel alone, even in a room filled with people, my heart goes out to you . I have experienced this countless times in my life while trying my best to pretend everything was good in my world. This past year has carried both challenges and triumphs, each one a reminder of how faithfully God shapes us through every season and strengthens us for what is next. If you suffered a loss that feels paralyzing and sometimes feel like you can't breathe while everyone makes merry, I celebrate the richness and depth of your emotions. You are appreciated. For who you are. For where you are at this moment. For how deeply, and passionately you care about others. And, for all that you are. You, my dear friend, are loved right now, more than my words could ever express. So, have courage, muster up the strength to pick up the phone and call someone if you need to. Remember the world needs you and your brilliance. And, yes, it’s possible to be both whole and gracefully broken open. It simply allows more of your light to be seen. Keep on shining brightly. As Christmas draws near, may this season wrap you in peace and remind you of the love and light that surround you. Whether this year has left you celebrating or healing, know that your presence matters and your light is needed. Merry Christmas... May the days ahead bring you strength, hope, and unexpected joy that warms your heart. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify and celebrate quiet wins. Before the year ends, name three wins from your organization that didn’t make headlines yet shaped growth. Share them with your people to remind them that every contribution matters.
By Lisa Marie Platske December 15, 2025
There are forces in the world that are intangible and unseen. Yet most folks rely on their physical senses, relying solely on what they can see, touch, weigh, and measure. I've often thought about Thomas in the Bible and what must have been going through his head to say, "Until I see His hands, feel the wounds of the nails, and put my hand to His side, I won't believe what you are saying." Oh, I get being skeptical to what cannot be explained. For safety's sake, I'm someone who wants a tangible, rational explanation for things in life. When something goes up, I expect there's a down. When something goes left, I expect there's a right. When things don't add up in the way that I've been told life works, it's confronting. When I look at leadership through this lens, I can better understand why my expectations of others haven't often been met. The majority of folks don't have the ability to cope with things that don't seem to make sense. Speaking about an intangible force that ensures the world keeps on spinning is more than just the universal law of gravity. That's God. And there's no simple explanation. Try to wrap your head around how the ground beneath your feet is actually suspended in mid-air, circling around a sun. Forces of nature like tornados and thunderstorms leave all folks helpless and feeling out of control. Because they are. It's not that most folks are ignorant about forces that are unseen and intangible. It's just they choose not to acknowledge their very power - and the amount of intelligence that is accessible when acknowledged. When I opened my business over 20 years ago and got into teaching leadership, I thought there was a simplicity to the work, where if certain principles were understood you could thrive. Over time, I've discovered that's just not true. Much of what occurs on the planet and in everyday life is entangled with cosmic alignment. People create all sorts of stories so they can wrap their head around that, so it's easier to digest rather than just understanding there are some things that you cannot explain. And again, for me, that's God. When I brought God into my body of leadership work, it started to make sense in ways that are hard to describe. There are no expectations about this plus that equals something else, as with intangible, unseen forces, the equation can have exponential results that cannot be explained. There is a way leadership comes alive when you make room for what cannot be explained. The moments when reason falls short and human understanding runs out are often the moments when the most extraordinary answers arrive. I have seen doors open that no strategy could have forced. I have watched solutions appear in the exact moment they were needed. That is what happens when you lead with an awareness of the One who holds it all together. The results may not make sense on paper, yet they carry a power that shapes lives and outlasts you. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to choose one leadership challenge you are facing right now. Write down what you can see and measure. Then name what you sense is also shaping the outcome — a conversation that came at just the right time, a shift in someone’s openness, an inner knowing you can’t ignore, a divine alignment that placed the right person in your path. Let both guide your next step.
By Lisa Marie Platske December 8, 2025
Over the past decade, I've had some really big wins. And because I've had success amnesia and struggle to celebrate my wins, my accomplishments never seemed good enough. Fifteen years ago, all I could see was what I was getting wrong. At that time, I stopped creating big goals (heck, any goals)—and my vision for my business grew smaller. Then I didn't have to feel as if I was a fraud. I would simply stick to what was working and not stretch myself any further. Unconsciously, I chose to live in my comfort zone and stop taking risks. To the outside world, everything looked good. ~ I had clients. ~ I had my own business. ~ And I had a comfortable life. Yet, inside, I was dying . Pieces of me were shriveling up and becoming unrecognizable. When you understand you have a Divine mission and purpose to fulfill and you're not fully using your gifts, abilities, talents, and experiences for good, it's like having your life force being taken from you. You start going through the motions without being present to the gift of life. Over time, you become numb to the possibilities, awe, and wonder that are all around you. Did you ever watch a little kid, and how they see the world through the eyes of God? Everything they notice seems to captivate them and bring them joy. Somewhere along the way, you lose that as an adult. Life becomes rote if you let it. That's what happened to me. And it's hard to lead yourself or others when you're in this place. Sometimes when you feel like you're not winning, you get the opportunity to reflect on what winning looks like. It's a compass that can lead you back home ... ... to a place where health, happiness, success, and meaning are ever-present. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify one part of your leadership or life that once brought you joy yet now feels routine. Take one intentional action this week to breathe life back into it—whether that’s reimagining a goal, initiating a meaningful conversation, or revisiting a practice that once inspired you. Even a single deliberate choice can reset your compass toward the place where health, happiness, success, and meaning grow strong.
By Lisa Marie Platske December 1, 2025
When I talk to folks about living out their Divine mission and purpose being the reason why leadership is so important, some people take a step back. "Who, me? A mission? And a Divine one? I'm not sure you've got the right character." Yet, this is something I’m 100% sure of. You were handpicked to do something on this planet. ~ Handpicked to be your mom’s son or daughter. ~ Handpicked to use the gifts you’ve been given and the experiences you’ve had. For a purpose. And I get that not everyone believes that because somewhere along the way, the world teaches you to shrink or make yourself smaller than you were created to be. So you wait for permission. Or you begin doubting your voice. Maybe that happened to you. And yet, here you are, you’re still here. Which means Heaven’s not done. You see, the Divine doesn’t make mistakes, and your presence isn’t accidental. Everything about your journey... ... the setbacks, the breakthroughs, the patterns you repeat, the people you meet ... has been preparing you. And if everyone chose to live from the belief that they're here for a purpose, the world would look vastly different. A purpose-led life requires leaders to step up and do something meaningful with their gifts, abilities, talents, and experiences. They understand they're born for something bigger than themselves. And that amount of courage is rare in today's world. I’m pretty sure you weren’t created just to scroll through TikTok or add another item to your cart. You were given a Divine mission. You were given a purpose that was assigned to you and only you. No one else can fulfill it. Just you. And without leadership, walking it out will be extremely hard. Leadership means taking full responsibility for your Divine assignment. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify one decision you’ve delayed. Maybe it’s stepping back from a leadership role you’ve outgrown. Maybe it’s restructuring something you built because it no longer aligns. Maybe it’s finally moving forward on the vision you’ve been sitting on for far too long. Block 30 minutes this week to address it with clarity and conviction. Because the longer you wait, the heavier it becomes.
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By Lisa Marie Platske December 22, 2025
This message comes three days before Christmas, a season that calls us back to love and light, from a place of deep gratitude and a depth of humility that has me moved to tears. From the Festival of Lights to the upcoming New Year's festivities, celebrations are all around. Parties, gift giving and conversations about being merry and jolly seem to fill the air a bit more during this time of year. Yet, this experience isn't true for everyone. I am mindful that this time of year doesn't bring lightness and joy for all. It is a time of year that can trigger memories of years gone by... ... broken dreams and longing for people you wish you could pick up the phone and hear their voice one more time. If you have lost a loved one this year, or simply feel alone, even in a room filled with people, my heart goes out to you . I have experienced this countless times in my life while trying my best to pretend everything was good in my world. This past year has carried both challenges and triumphs, each one a reminder of how faithfully God shapes us through every season and strengthens us for what is next. If you suffered a loss that feels paralyzing and sometimes feel like you can't breathe while everyone makes merry, I celebrate the richness and depth of your emotions. You are appreciated. For who you are. For where you are at this moment. For how deeply, and passionately you care about others. And, for all that you are. You, my dear friend, are loved right now, more than my words could ever express. So, have courage, muster up the strength to pick up the phone and call someone if you need to. Remember the world needs you and your brilliance. And, yes, it’s possible to be both whole and gracefully broken open. It simply allows more of your light to be seen. Keep on shining brightly. As Christmas draws near, may this season wrap you in peace and remind you of the love and light that surround you. Whether this year has left you celebrating or healing, know that your presence matters and your light is needed. Merry Christmas... May the days ahead bring you strength, hope, and unexpected joy that warms your heart. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify and celebrate quiet wins. Before the year ends, name three wins from your organization that didn’t make headlines yet shaped growth. Share them with your people to remind them that every contribution matters.
By Lisa Marie Platske December 15, 2025
There are forces in the world that are intangible and unseen. Yet most folks rely on their physical senses, relying solely on what they can see, touch, weigh, and measure. I've often thought about Thomas in the Bible and what must have been going through his head to say, "Until I see His hands, feel the wounds of the nails, and put my hand to His side, I won't believe what you are saying." Oh, I get being skeptical to what cannot be explained. For safety's sake, I'm someone who wants a tangible, rational explanation for things in life. When something goes up, I expect there's a down. When something goes left, I expect there's a right. When things don't add up in the way that I've been told life works, it's confronting. When I look at leadership through this lens, I can better understand why my expectations of others haven't often been met. The majority of folks don't have the ability to cope with things that don't seem to make sense. Speaking about an intangible force that ensures the world keeps on spinning is more than just the universal law of gravity. That's God. And there's no simple explanation. Try to wrap your head around how the ground beneath your feet is actually suspended in mid-air, circling around a sun. Forces of nature like tornados and thunderstorms leave all folks helpless and feeling out of control. Because they are. It's not that most folks are ignorant about forces that are unseen and intangible. It's just they choose not to acknowledge their very power - and the amount of intelligence that is accessible when acknowledged. When I opened my business over 20 years ago and got into teaching leadership, I thought there was a simplicity to the work, where if certain principles were understood you could thrive. Over time, I've discovered that's just not true. Much of what occurs on the planet and in everyday life is entangled with cosmic alignment. People create all sorts of stories so they can wrap their head around that, so it's easier to digest rather than just understanding there are some things that you cannot explain. And again, for me, that's God. When I brought God into my body of leadership work, it started to make sense in ways that are hard to describe. There are no expectations about this plus that equals something else, as with intangible, unseen forces, the equation can have exponential results that cannot be explained. There is a way leadership comes alive when you make room for what cannot be explained. The moments when reason falls short and human understanding runs out are often the moments when the most extraordinary answers arrive. I have seen doors open that no strategy could have forced. I have watched solutions appear in the exact moment they were needed. That is what happens when you lead with an awareness of the One who holds it all together. The results may not make sense on paper, yet they carry a power that shapes lives and outlasts you. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to choose one leadership challenge you are facing right now. Write down what you can see and measure. Then name what you sense is also shaping the outcome — a conversation that came at just the right time, a shift in someone’s openness, an inner knowing you can’t ignore, a divine alignment that placed the right person in your path. Let both guide your next step.
By Lisa Marie Platske December 8, 2025
Over the past decade, I've had some really big wins. And because I've had success amnesia and struggle to celebrate my wins, my accomplishments never seemed good enough. Fifteen years ago, all I could see was what I was getting wrong. At that time, I stopped creating big goals (heck, any goals)—and my vision for my business grew smaller. Then I didn't have to feel as if I was a fraud. I would simply stick to what was working and not stretch myself any further. Unconsciously, I chose to live in my comfort zone and stop taking risks. To the outside world, everything looked good. ~ I had clients. ~ I had my own business. ~ And I had a comfortable life. Yet, inside, I was dying . Pieces of me were shriveling up and becoming unrecognizable. When you understand you have a Divine mission and purpose to fulfill and you're not fully using your gifts, abilities, talents, and experiences for good, it's like having your life force being taken from you. You start going through the motions without being present to the gift of life. Over time, you become numb to the possibilities, awe, and wonder that are all around you. Did you ever watch a little kid, and how they see the world through the eyes of God? Everything they notice seems to captivate them and bring them joy. Somewhere along the way, you lose that as an adult. Life becomes rote if you let it. That's what happened to me. And it's hard to lead yourself or others when you're in this place. Sometimes when you feel like you're not winning, you get the opportunity to reflect on what winning looks like. It's a compass that can lead you back home ... ... to a place where health, happiness, success, and meaning are ever-present. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify one part of your leadership or life that once brought you joy yet now feels routine. Take one intentional action this week to breathe life back into it—whether that’s reimagining a goal, initiating a meaningful conversation, or revisiting a practice that once inspired you. Even a single deliberate choice can reset your compass toward the place where health, happiness, success, and meaning grow strong.
By Lisa Marie Platske December 1, 2025
When I talk to folks about living out their Divine mission and purpose being the reason why leadership is so important, some people take a step back. "Who, me? A mission? And a Divine one? I'm not sure you've got the right character." Yet, this is something I’m 100% sure of. You were handpicked to do something on this planet. ~ Handpicked to be your mom’s son or daughter. ~ Handpicked to use the gifts you’ve been given and the experiences you’ve had. For a purpose. And I get that not everyone believes that because somewhere along the way, the world teaches you to shrink or make yourself smaller than you were created to be. So you wait for permission. Or you begin doubting your voice. Maybe that happened to you. And yet, here you are, you’re still here. Which means Heaven’s not done. You see, the Divine doesn’t make mistakes, and your presence isn’t accidental. Everything about your journey... ... the setbacks, the breakthroughs, the patterns you repeat, the people you meet ... has been preparing you. And if everyone chose to live from the belief that they're here for a purpose, the world would look vastly different. A purpose-led life requires leaders to step up and do something meaningful with their gifts, abilities, talents, and experiences. They understand they're born for something bigger than themselves. And that amount of courage is rare in today's world. I’m pretty sure you weren’t created just to scroll through TikTok or add another item to your cart. You were given a Divine mission. You were given a purpose that was assigned to you and only you. No one else can fulfill it. Just you. And without leadership, walking it out will be extremely hard. Leadership means taking full responsibility for your Divine assignment. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify one decision you’ve delayed. Maybe it’s stepping back from a leadership role you’ve outgrown. Maybe it’s restructuring something you built because it no longer aligns. Maybe it’s finally moving forward on the vision you’ve been sitting on for far too long. Block 30 minutes this week to address it with clarity and conviction. Because the longer you wait, the heavier it becomes.
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