How to Be a Leader Worthy Enough to Have It All

I used to watch other people who seemed to be living the life they desired and wonder if that could be my reality too.

Could I really “have it all?”

Or was that idea about as real as the Easter Bunny or Santa Claus?

Now, I see that, yes… it is possible to have it all.

I’m sitting in an Airbnb writing this as I’m working on projects that have been on my heart for what feels like a lifetime…

I can see now how every step of my life has brought me to this place, and how I stood at a crossroads time and time again faced with opportunities to take the easy road or the rocky one where I got to do my own internal work (what I lovingly call the beingness of leadership journey) necessary to become a steward of this vision, of this life, of the capacity to “have it all.”

One of the biggest leadership lessons I’ve learned is that with every bump in the road and every wall you tear down, you get the opportunity to rise again, to pick up the pieces with compassion and love, and write a new chapter, think a new thought, become a new being …

I can see now that all along, every crumbling was life giving me the opportunity to look in the mirror and honor who I am, and my worthiness to live out my vision.

To be “worthy” is to have worth or value, and I find it to be an interesting word.

What am I seeking to prove? And to whom do I need to prove this worthiness?

I set out on a quest over the past decade to prove to myself that I am worthy — not just because “we’re all worthy” or because I read it in a book or took a course.

At the soul’s level, I desired to believe deeply that I am worthy. With that sense of worthiness, I could understand my purpose and then open doors to unlimited possibilities in order to be able to work towards my vision of creating a world where everyone wins. 

In the past I didn’t always believe my own worth because, well, I wasn’t always worthy and on some level, I knew it.

There were seasons in my life when I wasn’t a good employee, colleague, mentor, leader, sister, daughter, wife, friend … 

Over time I have worked to become more valuable and worthy.

By facing the parts of myself that weren’t trustworthy, that weren’t in integrity, that were out of alignment, I took steps to restore those parts.

• I learned to be gracefully broken open, take in feedback, discern what’s true, make necessary shifts, and let go of everything else.

• I learned how to stop apologizing for my directness, to start communicating with empathy and compassion, and to take personal responsibility for my mistakes, while also letting the people I love sit in the pain of their own errors in judgment, without needing to make them feel good about themselves.

• I learned to speak my truth, create strong boundaries, and express a deep appreciation and gratitude for the journey.

While I am perfectly imperfect, I stand in a place of refined worthiness – and make decisions based on my values and heart virtues of mercy, justice, and protection.

My path has had countless valleys, twists, and turns – and has not been what I thought it would be. And, yes, I’m still learning more and more every day about myself.

Because the beingness of leadership isn’t an easy path, many people muddle through life with old paradigms, figuring they have to go it alone, too afraid to find a guide — or feeling it’s too difficult to look at their own self-worth and how it is getting in the way of their happiness, success, and meaning.

On taking steps to honor your mission and allowing your vision to come to life, everything not in alignment gets highlighted. It becomes almost stubbornly obvious in order for it to be transformed.

Without this process, you wouldn’t be able to transmute into a leader that is truly worthy of having “it all.”

ACTION: The Upside Challenge of the week is to block time in your block time in your calendar to be in the envisioning process. Afterwards, notice what parts of your life may not be in harmony and resonance with that vision. **In terms of the brain (and emotionally), you can’t access the positive and creative if you’re focused on the negative. 

The world needs you and your brilliance, now more than ever.