The Best Road Through, Starts Within

LisaMarie • December 16, 2019

 

Four+ years ago, my business was growing and I said a prayer specifically asking to be sent someone who would complement my work and be able to coach my clients in a way that would give them added depth as a leader.


God (through Barb Wade) sent me success coach and emotional resilience expert, Suzanne Dudley-Schon.


What I love about Suzanne is how she gets that the beingness of leadership matters more than the doingness of leadership.


You can have all of the right leadership systems in place – and still not be a leader worth following.


This week, I’ve asked her to write this blog post for the Upside Thinker on the topic of designing your destiny.


Happy Reading!


In a typical day you can be exposed to thousands of images, whether on billboards, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, YouTube, films, videos, or magazine covers. The visual onslaught, while seemingly processed in the blink of an eye, may ultimately leave you feeling confused and infused with lurking doubt.


The visual presentation can fool you into believing it is a perfect representation of the real thing. Soon you may make comparisons and find your business, your life, and your self… lacking. 


You can jump into action and get lost in the frenzy of trying to achieve and be seen as having achieved. That…that image. And then end up in David Byrne’s song, “Once in a Lifetime”– looking like someone you don’t recognize, standing in a house that doesn’t feel like yours. Asking yourself,


What happened? What’s missing? How did I get here?


In racing after the image and trying to look good in it—your own compass often falls out of your proverbial pocket.


You end up living someone else’s life—probably the one you thought was on that billboard–only to discover that you are standing in your living room hugging painted cardboard. 


You got attached to the idea of what was represented. When in reality, your own version of that would be quite different. 


Because yours would be designed from your own heart’s calling—inside to out, rather than outside to in. 


You can’t walk on a movie set and then magically have a different life. 


You have to build the real thing—day by day, hour by hour, and choice by choice. And without having that compass or “set of plans” that is uniquely yours, you will be building someone else’s … or at best, it’ll be a generic “spec” one that could be anyone’s.


Who you are is formed by what you believe in and what holds meaning for you. 


Find that out. Get clear on what matters to you and why.


Then start building. You will soon find that you are intuitively picking up the right wood, finding the tools, generating the energy, surrounding yourself with people to help and guide you, and friends that are committed to your success.


Action:

The Upside Challenge of the week is to schedule some quiet time to review what you value the most. There is no right or wrong answer. Does your life reflect what you value? No matter “where” you find yourself, recommit to these values. Ensure your daily actions (and how you prioritize them) align accordingly. Notice how small mindful decisions add up. What new habits can support you in this effort?


As Lisa Marie says, the world needs you and your brilliance!



Suzanne Dudley Schon is the founder of CCC Coaching Solutions, a coaching firm that teaches clients how to create freedom, joy, and success in their business and career. 


Her clients include corporate executives, speakers, professors, and creatives including successful fine artists and show business professionals.


Suzanne is also a celebrated author. Her book Out of the Box; A Journey In and Out of Emotional Captivity, details her own journey to freedom from domestic violence a topic for which she is often asked to speak. She co-authored Is Oasis For You? and is a regular contributor to UnderstandingCompassion.com. Her poetry is widely published in literary magazines and in a new book out this year with Blue Light Press. 


Highly credentialed, Suzanne holds a psychology degree from Duke University, as well as credentialing from the International Coach Federation, and is a Certified Master Oasis Trainer, Certified Narrative Coach Core Practitioner, and trained in Reiki, Somatic Experiencing, and Vinyasa Yoga.


In addition to her own coaching business, Suzanne is entering her fourth year as a coach for Upside Thinking, Inc. where she brings fresh insights to clients on how to design their destiny and grow their business.


Involved in countless civic activities, she is also the CEO of Vine Street Associates, CFO of a family foundation, a trustee for the Montshire Museum of Science, and has served for 20 years on the board of Waypoint (Child and Family Services).


An award-winning actress and former champion hunter/jumper rider, Suzanne understands what it takes to succeed. A little bit feisty, she also adds humor and fun to work. 


One of her most joyful achievements is parenting– her two children and three step-children; all currently in various states of fledging. Although she appears to be one of the WASPiest looking people in any given room, Suzanne is actually the daughter of a Dominican woman, speaks fluent Spanish and really excellent improvised gibberish. 

By Lisa Marie Platske April 6, 2026
Divine obedience. I can't say for most of my life I understood what it meant. To be in the listening to where God wants me to be requires choosing to have enough time and space to listen. Yet I've always been rewarded by doing things quickly. Time and space seemed unnecessary. Or they were needed for folks who didn't learn or pick something up as fast as I did. When I type that now, I almost cringe. "Be still—and know that I am God." It is in the stillness, the soft whisper, that I often get to meet God. And that was elusive for big chunks of time in my life. I'd be running from one event to the next ... running from one opportunity and experience, and often get there out of breath, only to head out again on what I told myself was the next adventure. Rarely did I ever stop and consider where God wanted to lead me. Rarely did my leadership include Him. Rarely did I end up someplace refreshed and renewed—and at peace. Looking back, I can see the patterns that ran my life, and how far away from divine obedience they were. Yet that's what free will is about. The ability to choose. With intention. When you listen to the world's ways, you'll always end up depleted because you're never doing enough. Divine obedience has you listen, and carve out a path of peace and ease. That doesn't mean everything will go your way. Far from it. It does mean that you get to walk every moment stress-free. Even when it looks like everything around you is crashing down. I've lived through fires, floods, and tornados ... and walked away unscathed. I'm not sure the odds of doing this are even possible, let alone probable. Yet here I am. In the midst of the storm, and there will always be a storm, your leadership will ensure you walk on water or drown. With divine obedience, the former is a guarantee. And I gotta tell you that writing all of this out feels scary. For decades, I've been celebrated for my left-brain business mind ... the part of me that doesn't let emotion or things like faith get in the way of building a business with a sound strategy, processes, and standard operating procedures. I can—and have—helped scale hundreds of businesses to reach the elusive 7-figure mark in business, and I still do that in my work today. Yet, today I don't do it without taking everything to prayer. You may have met me when that wasn't how I operated, and my current business model doesn't work for you. And I get that. I just can no longer pretend that I'm somebody that I'm not. I take a fierce stand for my clients and their success—and for me, that involves taking every problem and challenge they face to God first. Together, we create a solution that is designed for the betterment of mankind —and includes everyone in their life. Again, I don't love talking about this. And, it's my Truth. So, how often do you stop and listen to where God is trying to lead you? ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to create space before you create movement. Choose one moment each day where you would normally push ahead. And instead of doing, stop. Sit in stillness for three minutes and invite God into the moment. Ask, “What is mine to do right now?” Wait. Take only the next faithful step you sense. This is divine obedience practiced daily. Calm leadership that walks on water.
By Lisa Marie Platske March 30, 2026
I wonder how much time I've spent trying to figure out how I'm going to get something to work. I wonder how many hours I've tried to get something "right" or figure out how I'm going to do something. I wonder how many minutes I've belabored what it would take to get what I wanted—and how it was going to happen. And it's not just me. Everyone wants to know "the how" of something coming together. That's part of the danger of spending too much time in the thinking mind. It wants answers. Yet the mind-brain was designed to keep humans safe. That's why there is a fight-or-flight mechanism wired inside each one of us. Over time, man began relying on the thinking mind for more than God ever envisioned. When I have a pressing problem, I used to believe I could think my way out of it, seeking the "right" way forward. Now, I take it to prayer, trusting that there's probably something I can't see on my own that will lead to a solution with greater ease than I can see on my own. Doing the heavy lifting myself is something I was accustomed to doing. I can hustle and grind, and muscle and might my way through just about anything. When others would give up, I'd still be standing because of my inner resolve to win. Yet choosing to live and run my business this way led to greater struggles, heartache, and feeling overburdened than asking God to lead ever did. This doesn't mean I get to abdicate responsibility and just surrender to whatever comes my way. Walking with intention requires personal responsibility. The how isn't any of my business as long as I stay the course, listening to where God's leading me. And the same is true for you, too. Most problems require stillness, presence, and an invocation of the answer that you can't see on your own. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to choose one thing you have been carrying in your head. Before you do something with it, pause and invite God into the moment. Then set a 15-minute timer and take one clear, practical action that is already in front of you. Stay present with the work until the timer ends. When the time is up, stop and release the rest back to God. This is how trust becomes embodied leadership, one intentional step at a time.
By Lisa Marie Platske March 23, 2026
In a world that is designed for you to have a plan and map out your every move, living moment-by-moment can be challenging. You will likely be met with judgment by the folks around you, feeling you move too slow or are a bit directionless. Yet the only way to experience peace is in this moment. It doesn't happen when you focus on your past. And it doesn't live in your future, either. Years ago, I had someone who was well-known in the world of transformational leadership reach out to me, asking if she could hire me. When I asked her what she wanted to work on, she shared that she wanted me to teach her how to be present. Huh? I didn't understand what she was asking or why it was an issue. And at the time, I couldn't figure out how to put together a package or offering on something that felt so natural to me. Over the years, I've discovered that presence is elusive for most folks. They don't understand its power or grasp how to attain it, and live in the here and now. Perhaps that's the reason Eckhart Tolle's book The Power of Now has sold millions of copies. When presence eludes you, you run back and forth chasing moments you once lived in the past—or spending time wishing for tomorrow to get here. The blessing of living in this moment means you get to see all of the gifts that are in your life right now. ~ The people you love ~ The places you enjoy ~ The experiences you cultivate When you run around comparing what was or what you think will be to this moment, you miss out on the gift of life that God has given you. And when you lead from this place, it's hard for others to want to follow you. Leadership requires a commitment to the here and now. And the best leaders are present to the wonder of life, living One Moment At A Time. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to practice leading from presence rather than a plan. When something interrupts your schedule or pulls you off your agenda, pause and stay in the moment instead of rushing ahead or reacting. Give your full attention to what is right in front of you and allow peace to guide your response. Trust that honoring the present moment is an act of faith, clarity, and leadership, and that what truly matters will unfold one moment at a time.
By Lisa Marie Platske March 16, 2026
What would happen if your vision, your wildest desire, became fulfilled? Then what? What if you were as successful, as impactful as your soul is nudging you to be? What if? Most folks never give themselves permission to answer those questions. The idea that life follows a rote rhythm and then one day your time has come to cross the rainbow bridge sounds awful to me. Yet I've met far too many folks who live their life this way, expecting very little—and giving very little in return. Long ago, I noticed this conscious and unconscious sleepwalking where the hottest thing on the market was what would keep you comfortable and out of pain. That trend, while appealing, seeks to remove all suffering from the human experience. If you really want your vision to come to life, you're gonna experience some heartache. That's reality. Suffering stretches you to become better ... to defy the odds, pushing on your growth edges and inviting you to rise up. What if you never sold out on yourself again? What if you asked for the best seat in the house and were offered even better? I believe you can, you will—and you must. For without vision, people perish. I believe in you. Start asking for the best and keep asking until you get it. That's the Upside Way. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to set aside ten intentional minutes this week and ask yourself this question and write the answer without negotiating it down. What vision did I quietly place on the shelf because it asked more of me? Let it be bold. It may feel premature or it may feel like it asks you to be seen before you feel ready. Honor it anyway. Then take one visible step that tests the vision in the real world. Share the idea. Voice the invitation. Signal your willingness to lead. And remember, you are committing to obedience.
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By Lisa Marie Platske April 6, 2026
Divine obedience. I can't say for most of my life I understood what it meant. To be in the listening to where God wants me to be requires choosing to have enough time and space to listen. Yet I've always been rewarded by doing things quickly. Time and space seemed unnecessary. Or they were needed for folks who didn't learn or pick something up as fast as I did. When I type that now, I almost cringe. "Be still—and know that I am God." It is in the stillness, the soft whisper, that I often get to meet God. And that was elusive for big chunks of time in my life. I'd be running from one event to the next ... running from one opportunity and experience, and often get there out of breath, only to head out again on what I told myself was the next adventure. Rarely did I ever stop and consider where God wanted to lead me. Rarely did my leadership include Him. Rarely did I end up someplace refreshed and renewed—and at peace. Looking back, I can see the patterns that ran my life, and how far away from divine obedience they were. Yet that's what free will is about. The ability to choose. With intention. When you listen to the world's ways, you'll always end up depleted because you're never doing enough. Divine obedience has you listen, and carve out a path of peace and ease. That doesn't mean everything will go your way. Far from it. It does mean that you get to walk every moment stress-free. Even when it looks like everything around you is crashing down. I've lived through fires, floods, and tornados ... and walked away unscathed. I'm not sure the odds of doing this are even possible, let alone probable. Yet here I am. In the midst of the storm, and there will always be a storm, your leadership will ensure you walk on water or drown. With divine obedience, the former is a guarantee. And I gotta tell you that writing all of this out feels scary. For decades, I've been celebrated for my left-brain business mind ... the part of me that doesn't let emotion or things like faith get in the way of building a business with a sound strategy, processes, and standard operating procedures. I can—and have—helped scale hundreds of businesses to reach the elusive 7-figure mark in business, and I still do that in my work today. Yet, today I don't do it without taking everything to prayer. You may have met me when that wasn't how I operated, and my current business model doesn't work for you. And I get that. I just can no longer pretend that I'm somebody that I'm not. I take a fierce stand for my clients and their success—and for me, that involves taking every problem and challenge they face to God first. Together, we create a solution that is designed for the betterment of mankind —and includes everyone in their life. Again, I don't love talking about this. And, it's my Truth. So, how often do you stop and listen to where God is trying to lead you? ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to create space before you create movement. Choose one moment each day where you would normally push ahead. And instead of doing, stop. Sit in stillness for three minutes and invite God into the moment. Ask, “What is mine to do right now?” Wait. Take only the next faithful step you sense. This is divine obedience practiced daily. Calm leadership that walks on water.
By Lisa Marie Platske March 30, 2026
I wonder how much time I've spent trying to figure out how I'm going to get something to work. I wonder how many hours I've tried to get something "right" or figure out how I'm going to do something. I wonder how many minutes I've belabored what it would take to get what I wanted—and how it was going to happen. And it's not just me. Everyone wants to know "the how" of something coming together. That's part of the danger of spending too much time in the thinking mind. It wants answers. Yet the mind-brain was designed to keep humans safe. That's why there is a fight-or-flight mechanism wired inside each one of us. Over time, man began relying on the thinking mind for more than God ever envisioned. When I have a pressing problem, I used to believe I could think my way out of it, seeking the "right" way forward. Now, I take it to prayer, trusting that there's probably something I can't see on my own that will lead to a solution with greater ease than I can see on my own. Doing the heavy lifting myself is something I was accustomed to doing. I can hustle and grind, and muscle and might my way through just about anything. When others would give up, I'd still be standing because of my inner resolve to win. Yet choosing to live and run my business this way led to greater struggles, heartache, and feeling overburdened than asking God to lead ever did. This doesn't mean I get to abdicate responsibility and just surrender to whatever comes my way. Walking with intention requires personal responsibility. The how isn't any of my business as long as I stay the course, listening to where God's leading me. And the same is true for you, too. Most problems require stillness, presence, and an invocation of the answer that you can't see on your own. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to choose one thing you have been carrying in your head. Before you do something with it, pause and invite God into the moment. Then set a 15-minute timer and take one clear, practical action that is already in front of you. Stay present with the work until the timer ends. When the time is up, stop and release the rest back to God. This is how trust becomes embodied leadership, one intentional step at a time.
By Lisa Marie Platske March 23, 2026
In a world that is designed for you to have a plan and map out your every move, living moment-by-moment can be challenging. You will likely be met with judgment by the folks around you, feeling you move too slow or are a bit directionless. Yet the only way to experience peace is in this moment. It doesn't happen when you focus on your past. And it doesn't live in your future, either. Years ago, I had someone who was well-known in the world of transformational leadership reach out to me, asking if she could hire me. When I asked her what she wanted to work on, she shared that she wanted me to teach her how to be present. Huh? I didn't understand what she was asking or why it was an issue. And at the time, I couldn't figure out how to put together a package or offering on something that felt so natural to me. Over the years, I've discovered that presence is elusive for most folks. They don't understand its power or grasp how to attain it, and live in the here and now. Perhaps that's the reason Eckhart Tolle's book The Power of Now has sold millions of copies. When presence eludes you, you run back and forth chasing moments you once lived in the past—or spending time wishing for tomorrow to get here. The blessing of living in this moment means you get to see all of the gifts that are in your life right now. ~ The people you love ~ The places you enjoy ~ The experiences you cultivate When you run around comparing what was or what you think will be to this moment, you miss out on the gift of life that God has given you. And when you lead from this place, it's hard for others to want to follow you. Leadership requires a commitment to the here and now. And the best leaders are present to the wonder of life, living One Moment At A Time. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to practice leading from presence rather than a plan. When something interrupts your schedule or pulls you off your agenda, pause and stay in the moment instead of rushing ahead or reacting. Give your full attention to what is right in front of you and allow peace to guide your response. Trust that honoring the present moment is an act of faith, clarity, and leadership, and that what truly matters will unfold one moment at a time.
By Lisa Marie Platske March 16, 2026
What would happen if your vision, your wildest desire, became fulfilled? Then what? What if you were as successful, as impactful as your soul is nudging you to be? What if? Most folks never give themselves permission to answer those questions. The idea that life follows a rote rhythm and then one day your time has come to cross the rainbow bridge sounds awful to me. Yet I've met far too many folks who live their life this way, expecting very little—and giving very little in return. Long ago, I noticed this conscious and unconscious sleepwalking where the hottest thing on the market was what would keep you comfortable and out of pain. That trend, while appealing, seeks to remove all suffering from the human experience. If you really want your vision to come to life, you're gonna experience some heartache. That's reality. Suffering stretches you to become better ... to defy the odds, pushing on your growth edges and inviting you to rise up. What if you never sold out on yourself again? What if you asked for the best seat in the house and were offered even better? I believe you can, you will—and you must. For without vision, people perish. I believe in you. Start asking for the best and keep asking until you get it. That's the Upside Way. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to set aside ten intentional minutes this week and ask yourself this question and write the answer without negotiating it down. What vision did I quietly place on the shelf because it asked more of me? Let it be bold. It may feel premature or it may feel like it asks you to be seen before you feel ready. Honor it anyway. Then take one visible step that tests the vision in the real world. Share the idea. Voice the invitation. Signal your willingness to lead. And remember, you are committing to obedience.
More Posts