Does It Feel Like You're Living the Same Day Over and Over?

Most folks understand the concept of rest. When you expend "x" amount of energy, your body is going to require you to replenish. Yet there's a certain type of weariness that no amount of sleep will produce the feeling of being energized in your body. When you're exhausted to the core, and it feels as if you've been wrung out like a dish rag, that level of fatigue is only overcome by giving your Soul rest. Living in a world where books about how to achieve more are plentiful, this isn't a conversation that's abundant in the business space. You've got to know how to hustle and grind when things get tough. I grew up hearing, "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going." I never heard about The Power of the Pause, or refueling my Soul. And so I pushed. And pushed a little more. And a little more. And figured I was just doing life wrong as all I got was more and more tired ... and a little bit angrier on the inside. Rest isn't about sleep. It's about peace. When you operate from this place, the trials that you face are easier to handle. If you spend your precious minutes criticizing, worrying, or comparing yourself to others, you cannot live your best life and lead others effectively. Out-of-control emotions fueled by fear or anxiety may make you feel as if there's more for you to do or you're not doing enough. Yet that's just fear. ~ Fear of getting something wrong and messing up your life ~ Fear of not figuring out what you're 'supposed' to be doing ~ Fear of disappointing yourself and others if you do or don't do something I could go on and on. Just pick one. And fear can be exhausting. It steals your peace, clouds your judgment, and keeps you stuck in cycles that wear you down from the inside out. This is why I’ve devoted my life’s work to walking alongside purpose-led leaders. Because I’ve seen what happens when you try to push through that kind of soul-deep fatigue alone or to keep going because people are counting on you, even when you’re running on fumes. And I also know what’s possible when you choose to lead from a place of alignment, when your soul is at peace, not just your calendar. Because when you lead from real rest, you show up steady and with ease. That kind of leadership is born from surrender. So pause. Set down the pressure to prove. Rest. Rest your mind from overthinking. Rest your spirit from striving. And most of all, rest in God. Remember, the world needs you and brilliance now more than ever. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to pause and realign before your next move. In the middle of your busy day, before you jump into the next task, stop. Take a deep breath and ground yourself. Ask this clearly: Is this the work I’m called to do right now? Does it align with who I am and the purpose I carry? If it doesn’t, lean into the wisdom to delegate or let it go. Leading well means knowing where to invest your energy and where to release control. This pause is a moment to realign your body, mind, and spirit so you lead from peace, clarity, and strength.

Good things are waiting for you around every single corner. One of my favorite movie lines comes from "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel" when Dev Patel says, " Everything will be alright in the end, so if it's not alright it's not the end. " There is a 2nd part of his quote that few folks remember - and that is, " The only real failure is the failure to try, and the measure of success is how we cope with disappointment. " I get that it’s not always been easy for you. It may feel like heartache and disappointment show up around every corner. Yet I hope you can see how everything that happens to you can be turned into good. I recently asked a client if they believed that God made mistakes—and they said "no". So if God doesn't make mistakes and all is perfect, then every situation, time, and place you've been in has been given to you for a reason. And they paused, sighed, and agreed. This is why I believe so much in the sovereignty of your being, and your ability to live from a place of choice and intention. When you get this, it makes you different than the many others on the planet who complain about their fate or circumstances. Courageous leadership takes, well, courage. You were never promised easy on your journey—and you can create ease and grace by remembering that you are the master of your fate and the captain of your destiny. That’s the foundation I built my business on. When I first began creating my programs and retreats, I didn’t do it because it was simple or convenient. I did it because I saw a gap between where people were and who they were called to be. I knew the pain of disappointment and the ache of untapped potential and I also knew there was a way through it with purpose, alignment, and leadership. So I started small. One courageous moment at a time. Each program, each retreat, each private session was designed to meet people right where they were and help them rise. I believe you can rise, too. There is more for you. There is so much more within you. Good things are waiting for you around every single corner. Go shine your light. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stand tall—literally. Each morning this week, before you start your day, stand up, roll your shoulders back, plant your feet firmly, and take one deep breath as if you’re stepping fully into your purpose. Then do one round of box breathing: Inhale for 4 counts Hold for 4 counts Exhale for 4 counts Hold for 4 counts Repeat this cycle twice. Let your body remember: You are the captain of your destiny. You are walking in purpose. You are ready for what’s next.

Napoleon Hill wrote how thought was the source of all riches, material, physical, and/or spiritual. Then, when I read an excerpt from his Positive Mental Attitude Success Course, I was reminded of the value of mentorship. To multiply your mind power, you can’t go it alone. He recommended having at least 4 types of talent in your life: a spiritual adviser, a financial adviser, a health adviser, and a personal adviser. Without ever reading his curriculum, I recognize it’s how I’ve set up my life. Because to get what you want ... you can’t do it alone. Lord knows I've tried ... Growing up, I was afraid of making a mistake or misstep. I walked on eggshells every day. This put an immense amount of pressure on me. Imagine trying to be perfect! Looking back, I could see that the grown-ups around me had made some big mistakes that led to some pretty unhappy results. My little girl self didn't want to suffer through any unnecessary painful circumstances so I took it upon myself to try for straight A's in life. This led to learning how to lie to look good and cover up the mistakes I made. The harder I tried, the more I just couldn't figure out how to get it right 100% of the time. By the time I got to my 30's, I realized I had to figure out how to get along with disappointment and imperfection. Trying to live like this was stressful - and I was tired of trying to do life on my own. I didn't have to be best friends with imperfection, however, we did need to hang out once in a while. :) That's when I got my first mentor in Federal law enforcement. He was the person I called when I just couldn't figure something out. Looking back, he was like a secret weapon in my career path, steering me from potential minefields every week. I'm not sure I would have survived some of my assignments without him. Over the years, there have been countless guides, mentors, allies, and coaches that have advised me on different legs of my journey. What most people fail to see are the dozens of folks that are standing behind the leader. Mentorship is essential. And it’s not just about strategy or success. It’s about alignment and surrounding yourself with people who speak life into your purpose and hold you to the highest version of yourself, even when you’re in the valley. You were never meant to carry the weight of leadership by yourself. You may be the one out front, yet you’re not supposed to be the only one in the fight. If you’ve been feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or like you’re the only one who gets it, this is your invitation. Get your people. The breakthrough you’ve been praying for might not come through hustle. It might come through alignment. This is the season to walk with wise counsel. Because no leader goes it alone, not one who finishes well. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify who’s in your corner. Take 10 minutes this week to reflect on the four types of advisers Napoleon Hill spoke about: Spiritual Financial Health Personal Now, write down one name for each category, someone you trust or could reach out to. If you come up short, don’t panic. Instead, choose one category where you feel the most need and reach out to someone this week. Ask for a conversation, schedule a coffee, or simply send a message of appreciation and curiosity. You don’t have to build your circle overnight. You just have to start. Because the path to wisdom, clarity, and strength begins with one brave ask.

Fifteen years ago, a Chinese medicine doctor read my bloodwork and told me if things didn’t change I would have less energy in 5 years, and people would tell me it was just aging. That one conversation has led me on a long journey with a singular desire: to be a more optimal version of who I am in all areas of my life. Over the years, things would happen in my life that would take me off-course. Behaviors and habits that once seemed manageable, at times felt impossible. Inevitably, my long-time commitment to healthy living was something that got challenged regularly by the people around me, family and friends alike. There have been several times on this journey where I will wake up, understanding something I'm doing needs to change. Immediately. I can't always put my finger on why, yet the signs are there. Going through the motions without the incredible excitement I used to feel about my business A growing task list Questioning my ability My answer used to be to ignore my physical health and just work longer hours hoping to push through what felt like a slump. When I listen to the prompting that something needs to change, I re-commit to what matters most. The longer I've done this, the more I've realized that I can only be healthy in mind and spirit when I'm healthy in my body. And this is one of the reasons we talk about the brain and sleep in the Upside Leaders Program. Because how you treat your body directly affects how you lead. Now, I’m taking more breaks than ever before, and have plenty of space to take regular walks and trail hikes on the farm. All of this allows me to move with intention throughout the day, living moment by moment. What’s been fascinating is that since I've done this bigger opportunities continue to come my way. It’s not the hustle that opens doors. it’s being aligned with who you are, what you want and why it matters. Remember, the world needs you and your brilliance now more than ever. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to stop and ask yourself: Where do you need to make a shift? God often reveals the need for a shift long before we act on it. It can be a strained schedule, a restless spirit, or a body that’s run down. Then take one aligned action. It can be clearing space on your calendar. Or going for a walk without your phone. Or going to bed earlier. The action doesn’t have to be dramatic and you don’t need to overhaul your life. It just needs to be intentional.

I was often annoyed when my cross-country coach would tell me to just believe in myself and envision crossing the finish line. “You’ve just got to believe in yourself.” Really?!? That’s it?!? If it were that simple, everyone would be doing it. And yet… it is that simple. Simple doesn’t mean easy. True belief in oneself takes effort and energy. It demands commitment and discipline. It’s not a quick fix or a motivational phrase you tape to the mirror and forget about the next day. It’s a muscle, a spiritual one and an emotional one that has to be exercised over and over again. There’s a reason most people give up before they ever reach the vision they once felt called to pursue. Somewhere along the way, their belief in themselves got buried beneath fear, fatigue, or comparison. When I look back at everything I've accomplished in my life, it was never complicated to get to the finish line. What it did require was consistent, often uncomfortable action, especially when I felt like I had very little left in my tank. I had to get quiet and reconnect with the vision. I had to remind myself why it mattered and I had to move forward even when the circumstances didn’t look favorable. ~ Some days I doubted my book would ever get published. (I’ve written 7.) ~ Some days I doubted if anyone would ever buy a ticket to one of my events. (I’ve hosted the Upside Summit for 18 years—and people kept coming back.) ~ Some days I doubted whether I'd ever get another client. (And yet, I’ve worked with over 100,000 leaders in the past 20 years.) It’s easy to look at the outcome and assume the path was certain. In each milestone, it was preceded by a moment of doubt—a moment that required me to choose belief over fear. The doubts were real. So was the belief that somehow, some way, the pieces would come together. Some days, it was my faith in God that pulled me through. Other days, it was a conversation with a friend, a coach, or a mentor. Truthfully, sometimes I needed all three. Because every great leader knows that no one goes it alone. And you do have to believe in yourself—and believe that where you're going is worthwhile to keep going. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to identify where you need more belief in yourself right now. Is there a decision you’ve been avoiding because doubt is louder than faith? Is there a dream you’ve shelved because the finish line feels far away? Whether it’s making a call, saying yes to help, or simply declaring out loud what you truly want… Do it. Remember, simple isn’t easy. Yet it is possible. And it’s worth it.

Have you ever been stuck in a long line, wishing you could just march right up to the front? When I was in my 30s, that’s exactly what my friends did at a local nightclub. At the time, I was mortified. Yet, deep down inside I thought it was the coolest thing. They carried themselves like they belonged, like they didn’t need anyone’s permission to take up space. I remember thinking… maybe that’s what leadership looks like. Take the risk. Be bold. Do what it takes to get ahead. It felt like confidence. It looked like power. And I'll admit ... there are times in my life when I made decisions based on how cool I thought something would make me vs. whether I thought it was the right thing to do. Over time, I’ve learned that what’s cool rarely aligns with what’s truly lasting. Cool fades. Purpose endures. It’s easy to be drawn to what turns heads or makes a strong impression and harder to stay anchored in what’s true, especially when it means standing alone. Leadership asks something deeper from you. It requires a willingness to listen for what’s real. To live with alignment. To walk forward even when no one’s clapping. And that's one of the hardest lines to walk in leadership. Every day you'll be confronted with decisions that will challenge you in ways that you never imagined. They will put your moral and ethical code on trial or out for bid to the highest buyer. If you make your decisions based on what you see others around you doing, or what the media says is "normal", you'll always fall short from what God has in store for you. When I first started my career in Federal law enforcement, I saw the world through a lens of good and evil. There was no middle or grey area. And then, over time, I watched colleagues make decisions that didn't sit well with me. Behaviors that left me questioning what the "right" thing to do, has challenged my moral fiber. We all carried the same badge. We all have the same set of credentials that read, " This officer possesses integrity. " Yet one of my closest partners made choices that eventually landed him in jail and serving time for his choices. Leadership will reveal what’s underneath. This is why the people around you deeply matter. When things get uncomfortable (and they will), you need to be surrounded by people who call you higher. People who see you for who you are and who you're becoming. That’s the sacred space we’re creating at the Upside Retreats. So here’s the invitation: Is it time to pause and look at the decisions you’ve been making? Is it time to notice who’s around you and whether those voices are helping you stay grounded in truth? Is it time to re-commit to who you are, what you want, and why that matters? Because life has never needed more cool leaders. It needs more aligned ones. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to step back from chasing what looks shiny and start leaning into what’s actually meaningful. Begin by making a list of three things you’ve recently said “yes” to because they sounded impressive or exciting. Then, identify the one that feels least aligned with your values or your calling and take one clear step back from it. That might mean turning down the next opportunity, rescheduling a commitment, or resetting expectations. Use the time and energy you free up to invest in something that may not be flashy yet fuels your deeper purpose.

I consulted with a potential client who had started a business and was making gobs of money. He shared with me that the downside was he has to deal with folks who don't do the right thing morally and ethically in running their business. Because he knew it and it didn't align with who he was, he was struggling and it was keeping him up at night. He was conflicted and wanted to talk it out with me. While I understood the struggle he was having between his mind and his Soul, I'm not an answer machine. I don't tell folks what to do. What I did tell him was that there are 6 Leadership Stepping Stones that lead to mastery. Make a misstep, and it may cost you your livelihood. That's the best way I can explain the importance of listening to your Soul's deepest wisdom. Years ago, I got myself in a jam not heeding this piece of advice. Someone I knew through a friend of a friend wanted to sponsor my annual leadership conference. Every time we got on the phone, I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that what they were saying just didn't add up. Some folks would say this is intuition. I've known it to be the voice of the Holy Spirit trying to give me direction. Even though I knew something was off, I said yes to the money. And it ended up costing me. How many times have you made mistakes like that... just because the money seemed too good to pass up? Listening isn't something that is always easy to do. You've got to be clear about who you are, what you want, and why it matters. After making one too many costly mistakes on my leadership journey, I decided that I was done trying to do it all on my own. The level of clarity I now have is perplexing to most folks. Yet this internal compass guides me throughout each day. When you're connected to this type of wisdom, you don't waste your time making decisions that take you off course, even for a split second. You move forward steadily with an ease that is hard to put into words. And the money always follows. There’s a cost to ignoring what you know deep down to be true. Whether it’s a gut instinct, your inner voice, or the prompting of the Holy Spirit, when you override it, you pay. I’ve paid. So has the leader I consulted with. Success without alignment will always leave you restless. And real clarity doesn’t come from grinding harder or checking more boxes. It comes when you stop long enough to listen to what your Soul is trying to say. It’s why I no longer walk alone. Because every leader needs space to sort through what matters most. ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to notice where you're choosing based on money and take one step toward alignment instead. Maybe it’s a client you’ve outgrown, yet you keep them because they pay on time. Maybe it’s an offer that feels off, even if it looks impressive. Maybe it’s a deal you’re rushing into just to hit a number. Pause. Check in. Then choose the path that brings clarity and is aligned, not just cash. Notice what opens up when you trust alignment over urgency.

Independence Day has just passed, and this year, it holds even deeper meaning for me. Twenty years ago, right around this time of year, I made a decision that would forever change my life. Back then, I believed leadership was about tactics. ~ How well you could communicate. ~ How skillfully you could negotiate. ~ How strategically you could build influence. I threw myself into learning every tool, every technique, every system I could find. I believed that if I mastered the tactical side of leadership, success would naturally follow. For a while, it looked like it was working. I traveled, I spoke, I trained leaders across industries. I had a seat at the table where big decisions were made. From the outside, everything seemed to be lining up the way it should. Inside, though, something was missing. No matter how many tools I taught, no matter how many strategies people mastered, they kept coming back saying, "It’s still not working." If I was honest, I felt the same way too. It was not a tactical problem. It was a spiritual one. In the early years, I spent all my energy giving people what I thought they needed. I handed them the best "wineskins" the world had to offer. The Bible talks about wineskins, and how you cannot pour new wine into old wineskins. If you do, the skins will burst and the wine will spill. The old wineskin, the way of doing leadership without being deeply connected to your Divine purpose, was not producing fruit - not lasting fruit. When I finally saw that, everything shifted. It became clear that leadership was not about tactics alone. ~ It was about who you are, what you want and why it matters. ~ It was about uncovering the Divine purpose planted within you before the world told you who you should be. Because if you are not aligned with your purpose, it does not matter how many tools you master. The foundation will not hold and the fruit will not last. Today, my work looks very different than it did twenty years ago. I still share tools, and I still value practical skills. These are important. They only make a lasting impact, when the heart-work is done first. That is why I created the Upside Leaders program , the Upside Retreats , and the Upside Thinking Live . Each one is designed to help you anchor deeply into your who you are, what you want and why it matters, so you can lead from a place of truth, not just tactics. As I celebrate this milestone, I want to thank you. Whether you have been part of this community for years or you just recently joined, you are part of the story that God continues to write. And there is so much more ahead... ACTION: The Upside Challenge for the week is to set a timer for 10 minutes and create a " Release and Receive" list. Write down one habit, strategy, or belief about leadership that no longer aligns with who you are, then physically cross it off, shred it, or throw it away as a sign of release. Immediately after, write one new action you will take this week that reflects the leader you are being shaped into and schedule it on your calendar. Transformation does not happen by wishing for change, it happens when you move in faith toward it.