Blog Layout

The Upside of Gray

Lisa Marie Platske • Feb 13, 2018

 

This week’s Upside Thought is by guest writer and Upside Thinking, Inc. Coach, Suzanne Dudley Schon. She was recently on stage at Design Your Destiny Live sharing her wisdom and genius. Suzanne brings truth and a bit of feistiness to the community. Enjoy discovering the Upside of Gray!


******************************************************************************************************************


The upside of gray…

I woke up today after a string of lovely, sunny days and the sky was a flat gray and there was a forecast for possible rain. Not my favorite. Not bad. Just gray… Sometimes the weather seems to affect my mood or it causes me to observe the impact on my mood differently.


Today, it got me to thinking that we have a lot of beliefs around “gray.”


Most commonly it holds connotations of not much fun, ill-defined, neither here nor there, not-positive, and uncertain-which most people find uncomfortable and a little gloomy.


When recently visiting a friend who lives outside of Atlanta, I learned something that I have only intuited before.


My friend is a brilliant photographer (among many things). She spent some time trying to teach me about apertures and shutter speeds and light. As the sun began to tuck itself behind some clouds, I noticed that the colors of the autumn leaves seemed more vibrant. Even the roadside flowers and the apples sitting in a basket seemed more clear and colorful.


I remarked on this phenomena to my friend, and she said, “Oh, you’re starting to see like a photographer!” She went on to say that bright sunny days are actually not the best for taking pictures. The light is too harsh, too direct. The gray, slightly cloudy days actually make the colors pop and allow the eye and camera to see more…


With her comment, I could practically hear a coin roll into the slot in my brain marked, “Value of Gray Days.”


As I thought about the physical significance of light and color and observations, I also mused about the metaphoric ones as well. How does an emotionally gray day show up for me? What is a gray day at work? What constitutes a gray area of understanding? What is a gray mental day feel and look like?


As I rolled the questions around in my mind, it struck me that in all of those grays, there is an upside perspective. A way of looking at the situation that if mined properly can yield bright colors, greater definition, understanding, and interesting detail.


Can you remember a day or moment that felt gray?


Was it in-between or uncertain or just not bright, clear, and sunny?


Can you recall what you did with that day?


Did you let it enfold you in gray lethargy or did you end up seeing more?


Here are 3 thoughts on having the upside of gray:


  1. “The gray” can be an invitation for you to look more carefully. You could notice a detail or two that you might have overlooked from your sunnier inspection. Fascinating questions or inquiry may be held within that “gray area.”
  2. When you hyper-focus on the hunt to a solution, it’s like having a full sun on the problem. However, sometimes the solutions actually reside on the edges. And oft times, it’s when you look away that you discover an A-HA moment.
  3. When a perspective is only delineated in two categories or rigid boundaries, it can lead to blind spots—and a great deal of misunderstanding and misrepresentation. Gray can actually show details, variation, granularity, specifics that are important to consider rather than being tossed into only two buckets.

The Upside of Gray - Suzanne Dudley Schon, Coach, Speaker, and Author, is a catalyst who is passionate about helping people to see differently, think differently, and act differently so that they experience freedom, joy, and true success – as they define it — in every area of their lives.


She graduated with a Degree in Psychology from Duke University, and beyond her academic studies, Coach Training, Reiki Training, and years of experience coaching clients, Suzanne considers her own life experience an invaluable source of her education. 


Her newly published book, Out Of The Box, A Journey In and Out of Emotional Captivity, has received rave reviews. And, Suzanne is also a trustee and board member of several non-profits, is a poet, actress, and the mother of two children, three step-children, and four geriatric dogs. 


Although she appears to be one of the WASPiest looking people in any given room, Suzanne is actually fluent in Spanish. The daughter of a Dominican woman and a New England born attorney, she credits the roulette wheel of DNA to her unusual combination of creative flare and pragmatism. 


*******************************************************************************************************************************

Action Item:

The Upside Challenge of the week is to determine where are you gray (feeling, work, relationship, situation) and identify what action you will take to turn it into something positive.


Remember, the world needs you and your brilliance

By Lisa Marie Platske 25 Mar, 2024
Peace showed up in my morning reflection time. I was reminded of this prayer, one of my grandmother's favorites. Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Yes please. I sang this poem at the Upside Summit several years ago. Peace is elusive for most folks ... especially those who fight lies that live in their head. About 15 years ago, a fellow speaker asked me to coach her on living in the present moment. She told me she struggled with sleepless nights and feeling as if she was never doing enough. I'd been there and knew what it was like to have a head full of anxious thoughts, robbed of a peaceful life. And being internally calm is something I've worked a long time on, and what many of the leaders I work with want. See, peace is no longer a struggle for me. Despite the noise and chaos that's often around me, I don't have the same level of noise in me. How about you? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Last month, I woke up to a storm and a roof leak. It's these situations where " Lord, make me an instrument of peace " comes alive in practical ways. Remember... The World Needs You and Your Brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to create a " Peace Practice " ritual for yourself which is especially helpful during a hectic work week. Take 5-10 minutes each day to intentionally cultivate a state of inner calm and presence. This could involve: - Sitting in silence, focusing on your breath - Listening to a guided meditation app - Reading an inspiring poem or prayer - Walking mindfully in nature - Doing gentle stretches or yoga poses The key is choosing a simple activity that allows you to release anxious thoughts. When feelings of stress, overwhelm or negativity arise, return to your Peace Practice. Use it as an anchor to realign with your intention for a peaceful mind. You get to choose calm over chronic anxiety. The world needs more leaders like you who prioritize their well-being so they can show up centered and resilient, no matter what arises.
By Lisa Marie Platske 21 Mar, 2024
Do you ever get stuck focusing on "how" you are going to do something? Most folks get fixated on the mechanics and figuring out the next steps, and then start to see imaginary obstacles, becoming paralyzed and failing to move forward. You don't have to have all the answers or even map out every step. One of my genius zones is identifying the ONE action to take that will make the biggest difference in realizing your vision. Sure, doubt may creep in, especially when the journey seems long. You may even feel overwhelmed. That's why it's best not to go it alone. I've long asked myself, " What is mine to do right now? " The million little moments have added up to me having a leadership and spiritual wellness center. Summit Hills Farm is a place where leaders come to do their work, as leadership is an inside job. The first place to start is answering three questions: ~ Who am I? ~ What do I want? ~ Why does it matter? When you answer these, the how takes care of itself. They will serve as a compass when you're feeling lost on your journey. And simple isn't easy. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to identify one idea you've been feeling stuck on. Instead of getting overwhelmed trying to map out every step of the "how", simply ask yourself: What is the next best small step I can take to move forward? Come up with ONE manageable action step you can accomplish this week. They should feel challenging but doable. Go shine your light. And keep moving forward.
By Lisa Marie Platske 18 Mar, 2024
My computer crashed, the screen on my phone shattered after a fatal drop, and after the roof leak and busted pipe in the apartment earlier in the week, I needed a date night sooner than later. Since Jim and I are typically in bed by 8pm, when we go out to eat it's really a date lunch. (smile) We decided to try someplace new, and it ended up exceeding our expectations. And it was what I would call a Kentucky gem. The food, the people, and the sign on the wall opposite the cash register had me want to come back, as well as forget about my bumpy week. I asked the owner's fiancé about the sign which read: If You Are Hungry and Have No Money, These Meals Have Been Paid for In Advance. Give a Server the Ticket and They Will Have the Kitchen Prepare Your Meal. One Meal Per day, One Meal Per Person. She shared that people give, and folks who are in need, often the homeless, can receive a meal every day. Yet often those receiving want to help out by taking out the trash, etc. It got me thinking about the good of humans and their natural desire to want to serve and give. Everyone wants the same thing. ~ To be valued. ~ To be appreciated. ~ To be loved. The best leaders get this. Jim and I bought 8 meals and shared a little goodwill in the midst of our rollercoaster-y week. Go shine your light. It's needed. Yes... the world truly needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to perform a small act of kindness for someone in need. Look for opportunities to extend compassion - a kind word, a donation to a food bank, bringing clothes to a shelter, buying a meal for a friend who's overwhelmed or overworked. Open your eyes and heart to those struggling around you. It may be someone closer than you realize. When you give freely without expectation, you receive just as much in return. In a society focused on individual success, make it a point to consciously choose to put someone in your community first. The world is better when we lift each other up.
By Lisa Marie Platske 14 Mar, 2024
The worst part of my business is seeing people with potential and watching them squander away their opportunities, understanding that if they put the work in and did it with consistent effort, they would be successful. Massively successful. Sure, they may have to make a few sacrifices. How do you think I got to where I'm at today?!? Instead, I see many folks with potential choose the path of least resistance, making excuses for their plight. I didn't get a silver spoon; rather, I graduated from The School of Hard Knocks. You've got to believe you can achieve what you want -- and that you're worthy to have it. This determines what's possible as it's the seed that will produce delicious fruit or not. You can't choose actions and make decisions from a place of lack or scarcity. That only leads to negative results. To change the success cycle, you have to first see the outcome you want, and then believe it's possible because your mind can't tell the difference between what is imagined and what is real. This goes back to the body of work that Aristotle and Plato brought to the world. If you can start to envision what your life will be like putting in the effort and getting the results, you can change the momentum in your life. Most people only envision the result -- and not the work. They see the car they want to drive or the house they want to live in, and forget to envision what they are willing to do to put forth the effort, energy, and work to have what they want. I've learned the more I do the hard things, the easier my life gets. When I do the easy things, the harder my life gets. Believe in yourself and take the necessary actions. If you don't think what you want is possible, borrow my belief in you. The World Needs You and Your Brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to pick one area of your life where you've been making excuses or taking the path of least resistance. Identify the potential you have in this area that you have not fully tapped into if you were to do the work. Visualize in detail what it would look like and feel like if you put in the effort and achieved the success you desire. Let yourself believe at your core that you are capable of making it happen. Then, write down 1-3 small, specific action steps you can take this week to start making progress. They should feel challenging and actionable. Remember, the only limits on your potential are the ones you place on yourself. That's the power of Upside Thinking.
More Posts
By Lisa Marie Platske 25 Mar, 2024
Peace showed up in my morning reflection time. I was reminded of this prayer, one of my grandmother's favorites. Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Yes please. I sang this poem at the Upside Summit several years ago. Peace is elusive for most folks ... especially those who fight lies that live in their head. About 15 years ago, a fellow speaker asked me to coach her on living in the present moment. She told me she struggled with sleepless nights and feeling as if she was never doing enough. I'd been there and knew what it was like to have a head full of anxious thoughts, robbed of a peaceful life. And being internally calm is something I've worked a long time on, and what many of the leaders I work with want. See, peace is no longer a struggle for me. Despite the noise and chaos that's often around me, I don't have the same level of noise in me. How about you? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Last month, I woke up to a storm and a roof leak. It's these situations where " Lord, make me an instrument of peace " comes alive in practical ways. Remember... The World Needs You and Your Brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to create a " Peace Practice " ritual for yourself which is especially helpful during a hectic work week. Take 5-10 minutes each day to intentionally cultivate a state of inner calm and presence. This could involve: - Sitting in silence, focusing on your breath - Listening to a guided meditation app - Reading an inspiring poem or prayer - Walking mindfully in nature - Doing gentle stretches or yoga poses The key is choosing a simple activity that allows you to release anxious thoughts. When feelings of stress, overwhelm or negativity arise, return to your Peace Practice. Use it as an anchor to realign with your intention for a peaceful mind. You get to choose calm over chronic anxiety. The world needs more leaders like you who prioritize their well-being so they can show up centered and resilient, no matter what arises.
By Lisa Marie Platske 21 Mar, 2024
Do you ever get stuck focusing on "how" you are going to do something? Most folks get fixated on the mechanics and figuring out the next steps, and then start to see imaginary obstacles, becoming paralyzed and failing to move forward. You don't have to have all the answers or even map out every step. One of my genius zones is identifying the ONE action to take that will make the biggest difference in realizing your vision. Sure, doubt may creep in, especially when the journey seems long. You may even feel overwhelmed. That's why it's best not to go it alone. I've long asked myself, " What is mine to do right now? " The million little moments have added up to me having a leadership and spiritual wellness center. Summit Hills Farm is a place where leaders come to do their work, as leadership is an inside job. The first place to start is answering three questions: ~ Who am I? ~ What do I want? ~ Why does it matter? When you answer these, the how takes care of itself. They will serve as a compass when you're feeling lost on your journey. And simple isn't easy. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to identify one idea you've been feeling stuck on. Instead of getting overwhelmed trying to map out every step of the "how", simply ask yourself: What is the next best small step I can take to move forward? Come up with ONE manageable action step you can accomplish this week. They should feel challenging but doable. Go shine your light. And keep moving forward.
By Lisa Marie Platske 18 Mar, 2024
My computer crashed, the screen on my phone shattered after a fatal drop, and after the roof leak and busted pipe in the apartment earlier in the week, I needed a date night sooner than later. Since Jim and I are typically in bed by 8pm, when we go out to eat it's really a date lunch. (smile) We decided to try someplace new, and it ended up exceeding our expectations. And it was what I would call a Kentucky gem. The food, the people, and the sign on the wall opposite the cash register had me want to come back, as well as forget about my bumpy week. I asked the owner's fiancé about the sign which read: If You Are Hungry and Have No Money, These Meals Have Been Paid for In Advance. Give a Server the Ticket and They Will Have the Kitchen Prepare Your Meal. One Meal Per day, One Meal Per Person. She shared that people give, and folks who are in need, often the homeless, can receive a meal every day. Yet often those receiving want to help out by taking out the trash, etc. It got me thinking about the good of humans and their natural desire to want to serve and give. Everyone wants the same thing. ~ To be valued. ~ To be appreciated. ~ To be loved. The best leaders get this. Jim and I bought 8 meals and shared a little goodwill in the midst of our rollercoaster-y week. Go shine your light. It's needed. Yes... the world truly needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to perform a small act of kindness for someone in need. Look for opportunities to extend compassion - a kind word, a donation to a food bank, bringing clothes to a shelter, buying a meal for a friend who's overwhelmed or overworked. Open your eyes and heart to those struggling around you. It may be someone closer than you realize. When you give freely without expectation, you receive just as much in return. In a society focused on individual success, make it a point to consciously choose to put someone in your community first. The world is better when we lift each other up.
By Lisa Marie Platske 14 Mar, 2024
The worst part of my business is seeing people with potential and watching them squander away their opportunities, understanding that if they put the work in and did it with consistent effort, they would be successful. Massively successful. Sure, they may have to make a few sacrifices. How do you think I got to where I'm at today?!? Instead, I see many folks with potential choose the path of least resistance, making excuses for their plight. I didn't get a silver spoon; rather, I graduated from The School of Hard Knocks. You've got to believe you can achieve what you want -- and that you're worthy to have it. This determines what's possible as it's the seed that will produce delicious fruit or not. You can't choose actions and make decisions from a place of lack or scarcity. That only leads to negative results. To change the success cycle, you have to first see the outcome you want, and then believe it's possible because your mind can't tell the difference between what is imagined and what is real. This goes back to the body of work that Aristotle and Plato brought to the world. If you can start to envision what your life will be like putting in the effort and getting the results, you can change the momentum in your life. Most people only envision the result -- and not the work. They see the car they want to drive or the house they want to live in, and forget to envision what they are willing to do to put forth the effort, energy, and work to have what they want. I've learned the more I do the hard things, the easier my life gets. When I do the easy things, the harder my life gets. Believe in yourself and take the necessary actions. If you don't think what you want is possible, borrow my belief in you. The World Needs You and Your Brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to pick one area of your life where you've been making excuses or taking the path of least resistance. Identify the potential you have in this area that you have not fully tapped into if you were to do the work. Visualize in detail what it would look like and feel like if you put in the effort and achieved the success you desire. Let yourself believe at your core that you are capable of making it happen. Then, write down 1-3 small, specific action steps you can take this week to start making progress. They should feel challenging and actionable. Remember, the only limits on your potential are the ones you place on yourself. That's the power of Upside Thinking.
More Posts
Share by: