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The Beauty & Benefit of Authenticity

Lisa Marie Platske • Sep 26, 2017

 

Being you has an advantage and it’s always what is best. You have the right to claim who you are! Let me tell you about the benefit of authenticity.


On a recent group coaching call, one of my clients made a powerful statement that had me pause and take notice.


She said, “I’m claiming my right to be me.” Benefit of Authenticity - Lisa Marie Platske


As someone who is fascinated with language and the meaning behind each word, I found this to be an incredibly strong, yet moving choice of words.


After our call, I thought about why this message was one that made me sit up a bit straighter in my chair.


When I was doing research on leadership 10 years ago, I put together themes that later formed my 7 Pillars of Leadership™.


I expected to find certain elements that were spoken about in countless leadership books throughout the years.


What I found through these dialogues was a bit more humanity and realness about what it takes to be a successful leader, one that is worth following on character and merit.


It was difficult for me to capture their essence in a few words like “risk taker” or “out-of-the-box thinker” so I chose to encapsulate my findings in 7 Pillars of Leadership™.


These 7 Pillars are what I speak about at length at my annual Design Your Destiny Live event — and they serve as the foundation when I go into organizations or coach private individuals.


The one that surprised me the most was the second pillar — Personality.


Understand your personality.


The more I examined this pillar, the more I found evidence that only a small percentage of people really know who they are – and are willing to claim it.


Yet, most people are told, “Be yourself.” — and have no clue what that means.


This was one of the reasons I set out on a quest to learn about positioning and how it works.


It’s also why the foundation of my business is that you can have anything you want without having to change who you are.


You probably grew up with hearing messages that said that you should work hard to be better.


Better than what?


  • Better at the violin?
  • Better than other kids at school?
  • Better than your neighbors?
  • Better than the people you work with?

Better than.


This “better than” message is one I bought into for years as I kept striving to get better at my work and life.


On the outside, it looks like this premise served me well.


But, on the inside, it always made me feel “less than”.


Better than is temporary and fleeting.


American writer Max Ehrman shares in his “Desiderata” poem, “If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.”


In business, there will always be others who have a more distinguished degree, at a more prestigious university, who are well-accomplished, offering what you do at a lower price or with more bells and whistles.


So, what am I saying?


That you need to be the best, not just better?


Well, not exactly.


It doesn’t matter if you’re the best if you’re not authentically you.


You’ll end up exhausted and frustrated as if a piece of you is dying inside every time you do your work.


Being you has an advantage and it’s always what is best.


Your personality and its unique combination can’t be duplicated or matched.


When you don’t have to prove, protect, or change who you are – and you get to use your talents and genius fully, you attract the attention you need to succeed for all of the right reasons.


Plus, it takes less energy and time to be who you were created to be in the first place.


Look, this doesn’t mean that everyone will appreciate who you are or your natural gifts, talents, and abilities.


But, the right people will.


Your people.


Every year, I get loving mail, and hate mail in my inbox as well as glowing feedback and not-so-complimentary feedback at my events.


There are people who love and appreciate who I am, and others who think I’m a charlatan.


As long as I know I’ve been fully and completely me, didn’t intentionally cause harm to anyone (my heart virtues are mercy, justice, and protection), apologize for whatever I may have done and forgive and release those that have harmed me, I sleep well at night, knowing that not everyone is “my people”.


You have the right to claim who you are.


Just know that not everyone will like it, or be comfortable with it.


But, not everyone will be “your people” either.


That’s not your BIG mission in the world — to make others like you or approve of you.


Comfort doesn’t change the world. Vulnerability….changes everything.


The world needs you and your brilliance.


Not a watered-down version of you or one that will make everyone happy.


Realize who you are and who you’re not.


And, give yourself permission to claim the right to be you.


Action Item: Benefit of Authenticity - Lisa Marie Platske

The Upside Challenge of the week is to think about an area of your personality you’ve been hiding. What are you afraid of shining light on for fear of upsetting, disappointing, or disrupting others view of who you are? Choose one action to step into this facet of your personality.


Comfort doesn’t change the world. Vulnerability…. changes everything.


The world needs you and your brilliance.

By Lisa Marie Platske 25 Mar, 2024
Peace showed up in my morning reflection time. I was reminded of this prayer, one of my grandmother's favorites. Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Yes please. I sang this poem at the Upside Summit several years ago. Peace is elusive for most folks ... especially those who fight lies that live in their head. About 15 years ago, a fellow speaker asked me to coach her on living in the present moment. She told me she struggled with sleepless nights and feeling as if she was never doing enough. I'd been there and knew what it was like to have a head full of anxious thoughts, robbed of a peaceful life. And being internally calm is something I've worked a long time on, and what many of the leaders I work with want. See, peace is no longer a struggle for me. Despite the noise and chaos that's often around me, I don't have the same level of noise in me. How about you? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Last month, I woke up to a storm and a roof leak. It's these situations where " Lord, make me an instrument of peace " comes alive in practical ways. Remember... The World Needs You and Your Brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to create a " Peace Practice " ritual for yourself which is especially helpful during a hectic work week. Take 5-10 minutes each day to intentionally cultivate a state of inner calm and presence. This could involve: - Sitting in silence, focusing on your breath - Listening to a guided meditation app - Reading an inspiring poem or prayer - Walking mindfully in nature - Doing gentle stretches or yoga poses The key is choosing a simple activity that allows you to release anxious thoughts. When feelings of stress, overwhelm or negativity arise, return to your Peace Practice. Use it as an anchor to realign with your intention for a peaceful mind. You get to choose calm over chronic anxiety. The world needs more leaders like you who prioritize their well-being so they can show up centered and resilient, no matter what arises.
By Lisa Marie Platske 21 Mar, 2024
Do you ever get stuck focusing on "how" you are going to do something? Most folks get fixated on the mechanics and figuring out the next steps, and then start to see imaginary obstacles, becoming paralyzed and failing to move forward. You don't have to have all the answers or even map out every step. One of my genius zones is identifying the ONE action to take that will make the biggest difference in realizing your vision. Sure, doubt may creep in, especially when the journey seems long. You may even feel overwhelmed. That's why it's best not to go it alone. I've long asked myself, " What is mine to do right now? " The million little moments have added up to me having a leadership and spiritual wellness center. Summit Hills Farm is a place where leaders come to do their work, as leadership is an inside job. The first place to start is answering three questions: ~ Who am I? ~ What do I want? ~ Why does it matter? When you answer these, the how takes care of itself. They will serve as a compass when you're feeling lost on your journey. And simple isn't easy. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to identify one idea you've been feeling stuck on. Instead of getting overwhelmed trying to map out every step of the "how", simply ask yourself: What is the next best small step I can take to move forward? Come up with ONE manageable action step you can accomplish this week. They should feel challenging but doable. Go shine your light. And keep moving forward.
By Lisa Marie Platske 18 Mar, 2024
My computer crashed, the screen on my phone shattered after a fatal drop, and after the roof leak and busted pipe in the apartment earlier in the week, I needed a date night sooner than later. Since Jim and I are typically in bed by 8pm, when we go out to eat it's really a date lunch. (smile) We decided to try someplace new, and it ended up exceeding our expectations. And it was what I would call a Kentucky gem. The food, the people, and the sign on the wall opposite the cash register had me want to come back, as well as forget about my bumpy week. I asked the owner's fiancé about the sign which read: If You Are Hungry and Have No Money, These Meals Have Been Paid for In Advance. Give a Server the Ticket and They Will Have the Kitchen Prepare Your Meal. One Meal Per day, One Meal Per Person. She shared that people give, and folks who are in need, often the homeless, can receive a meal every day. Yet often those receiving want to help out by taking out the trash, etc. It got me thinking about the good of humans and their natural desire to want to serve and give. Everyone wants the same thing. ~ To be valued. ~ To be appreciated. ~ To be loved. The best leaders get this. Jim and I bought 8 meals and shared a little goodwill in the midst of our rollercoaster-y week. Go shine your light. It's needed. Yes... the world truly needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to perform a small act of kindness for someone in need. Look for opportunities to extend compassion - a kind word, a donation to a food bank, bringing clothes to a shelter, buying a meal for a friend who's overwhelmed or overworked. Open your eyes and heart to those struggling around you. It may be someone closer than you realize. When you give freely without expectation, you receive just as much in return. In a society focused on individual success, make it a point to consciously choose to put someone in your community first. The world is better when we lift each other up.
By Lisa Marie Platske 14 Mar, 2024
The worst part of my business is seeing people with potential and watching them squander away their opportunities, understanding that if they put the work in and did it with consistent effort, they would be successful. Massively successful. Sure, they may have to make a few sacrifices. How do you think I got to where I'm at today?!? Instead, I see many folks with potential choose the path of least resistance, making excuses for their plight. I didn't get a silver spoon; rather, I graduated from The School of Hard Knocks. You've got to believe you can achieve what you want -- and that you're worthy to have it. This determines what's possible as it's the seed that will produce delicious fruit or not. You can't choose actions and make decisions from a place of lack or scarcity. That only leads to negative results. To change the success cycle, you have to first see the outcome you want, and then believe it's possible because your mind can't tell the difference between what is imagined and what is real. This goes back to the body of work that Aristotle and Plato brought to the world. If you can start to envision what your life will be like putting in the effort and getting the results, you can change the momentum in your life. Most people only envision the result -- and not the work. They see the car they want to drive or the house they want to live in, and forget to envision what they are willing to do to put forth the effort, energy, and work to have what they want. I've learned the more I do the hard things, the easier my life gets. When I do the easy things, the harder my life gets. Believe in yourself and take the necessary actions. If you don't think what you want is possible, borrow my belief in you. The World Needs You and Your Brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to pick one area of your life where you've been making excuses or taking the path of least resistance. Identify the potential you have in this area that you have not fully tapped into if you were to do the work. Visualize in detail what it would look like and feel like if you put in the effort and achieved the success you desire. Let yourself believe at your core that you are capable of making it happen. Then, write down 1-3 small, specific action steps you can take this week to start making progress. They should feel challenging and actionable. Remember, the only limits on your potential are the ones you place on yourself. That's the power of Upside Thinking.
More Posts
By Lisa Marie Platske 25 Mar, 2024
Peace showed up in my morning reflection time. I was reminded of this prayer, one of my grandmother's favorites. Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Yes please. I sang this poem at the Upside Summit several years ago. Peace is elusive for most folks ... especially those who fight lies that live in their head. About 15 years ago, a fellow speaker asked me to coach her on living in the present moment. She told me she struggled with sleepless nights and feeling as if she was never doing enough. I'd been there and knew what it was like to have a head full of anxious thoughts, robbed of a peaceful life. And being internally calm is something I've worked a long time on, and what many of the leaders I work with want. See, peace is no longer a struggle for me. Despite the noise and chaos that's often around me, I don't have the same level of noise in me. How about you? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Last month, I woke up to a storm and a roof leak. It's these situations where " Lord, make me an instrument of peace " comes alive in practical ways. Remember... The World Needs You and Your Brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to create a " Peace Practice " ritual for yourself which is especially helpful during a hectic work week. Take 5-10 minutes each day to intentionally cultivate a state of inner calm and presence. This could involve: - Sitting in silence, focusing on your breath - Listening to a guided meditation app - Reading an inspiring poem or prayer - Walking mindfully in nature - Doing gentle stretches or yoga poses The key is choosing a simple activity that allows you to release anxious thoughts. When feelings of stress, overwhelm or negativity arise, return to your Peace Practice. Use it as an anchor to realign with your intention for a peaceful mind. You get to choose calm over chronic anxiety. The world needs more leaders like you who prioritize their well-being so they can show up centered and resilient, no matter what arises.
By Lisa Marie Platske 21 Mar, 2024
Do you ever get stuck focusing on "how" you are going to do something? Most folks get fixated on the mechanics and figuring out the next steps, and then start to see imaginary obstacles, becoming paralyzed and failing to move forward. You don't have to have all the answers or even map out every step. One of my genius zones is identifying the ONE action to take that will make the biggest difference in realizing your vision. Sure, doubt may creep in, especially when the journey seems long. You may even feel overwhelmed. That's why it's best not to go it alone. I've long asked myself, " What is mine to do right now? " The million little moments have added up to me having a leadership and spiritual wellness center. Summit Hills Farm is a place where leaders come to do their work, as leadership is an inside job. The first place to start is answering three questions: ~ Who am I? ~ What do I want? ~ Why does it matter? When you answer these, the how takes care of itself. They will serve as a compass when you're feeling lost on your journey. And simple isn't easy. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to identify one idea you've been feeling stuck on. Instead of getting overwhelmed trying to map out every step of the "how", simply ask yourself: What is the next best small step I can take to move forward? Come up with ONE manageable action step you can accomplish this week. They should feel challenging but doable. Go shine your light. And keep moving forward.
By Lisa Marie Platske 18 Mar, 2024
My computer crashed, the screen on my phone shattered after a fatal drop, and after the roof leak and busted pipe in the apartment earlier in the week, I needed a date night sooner than later. Since Jim and I are typically in bed by 8pm, when we go out to eat it's really a date lunch. (smile) We decided to try someplace new, and it ended up exceeding our expectations. And it was what I would call a Kentucky gem. The food, the people, and the sign on the wall opposite the cash register had me want to come back, as well as forget about my bumpy week. I asked the owner's fiancé about the sign which read: If You Are Hungry and Have No Money, These Meals Have Been Paid for In Advance. Give a Server the Ticket and They Will Have the Kitchen Prepare Your Meal. One Meal Per day, One Meal Per Person. She shared that people give, and folks who are in need, often the homeless, can receive a meal every day. Yet often those receiving want to help out by taking out the trash, etc. It got me thinking about the good of humans and their natural desire to want to serve and give. Everyone wants the same thing. ~ To be valued. ~ To be appreciated. ~ To be loved. The best leaders get this. Jim and I bought 8 meals and shared a little goodwill in the midst of our rollercoaster-y week. Go shine your light. It's needed. Yes... the world truly needs you and your brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to perform a small act of kindness for someone in need. Look for opportunities to extend compassion - a kind word, a donation to a food bank, bringing clothes to a shelter, buying a meal for a friend who's overwhelmed or overworked. Open your eyes and heart to those struggling around you. It may be someone closer than you realize. When you give freely without expectation, you receive just as much in return. In a society focused on individual success, make it a point to consciously choose to put someone in your community first. The world is better when we lift each other up.
By Lisa Marie Platske 14 Mar, 2024
The worst part of my business is seeing people with potential and watching them squander away their opportunities, understanding that if they put the work in and did it with consistent effort, they would be successful. Massively successful. Sure, they may have to make a few sacrifices. How do you think I got to where I'm at today?!? Instead, I see many folks with potential choose the path of least resistance, making excuses for their plight. I didn't get a silver spoon; rather, I graduated from The School of Hard Knocks. You've got to believe you can achieve what you want -- and that you're worthy to have it. This determines what's possible as it's the seed that will produce delicious fruit or not. You can't choose actions and make decisions from a place of lack or scarcity. That only leads to negative results. To change the success cycle, you have to first see the outcome you want, and then believe it's possible because your mind can't tell the difference between what is imagined and what is real. This goes back to the body of work that Aristotle and Plato brought to the world. If you can start to envision what your life will be like putting in the effort and getting the results, you can change the momentum in your life. Most people only envision the result -- and not the work. They see the car they want to drive or the house they want to live in, and forget to envision what they are willing to do to put forth the effort, energy, and work to have what they want. I've learned the more I do the hard things, the easier my life gets. When I do the easy things, the harder my life gets. Believe in yourself and take the necessary actions. If you don't think what you want is possible, borrow my belief in you. The World Needs You and Your Brilliance. ACTION: The Upside Challenge this week is to pick one area of your life where you've been making excuses or taking the path of least resistance. Identify the potential you have in this area that you have not fully tapped into if you were to do the work. Visualize in detail what it would look like and feel like if you put in the effort and achieved the success you desire. Let yourself believe at your core that you are capable of making it happen. Then, write down 1-3 small, specific action steps you can take this week to start making progress. They should feel challenging and actionable. Remember, the only limits on your potential are the ones you place on yourself. That's the power of Upside Thinking.
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